Just made it - Werribee City 1 South Melbourne 2

Waiting in the car park for 20 minutes for the delayed Steve from Broady at Newport station meant getting to the outskirts of Galvin Park with only about five minutes until kickoff in the senior game. Parking a good half kilometre down the road was made worse when one South bloke known to us here at South of the Border managed to rock up and nab a space near the old front gate. At Galvin Park itself, once we walked past the various cricket finals being played, it looked like space had been cleared and fenced off for the construction of something new, but I'm not sure we needed to be forced to go around an extra 50 metres to get in to a makeshift entrance. One bloke looking to pay to get in almost handed me ten bucks by accident.

Even if there was no sign of the stand they're planning to build on the outer side - and who are we to judge, we who've been missing a social club for nearly five years now - at least the scaffolding was already set up by the home club this time. A couple of blokes recommend the chicken schnitzel burger, which while not containing any mayo, is apparently a nice thick piece of bird, with a flavourful crumb - and best of all, no need to wait, as they have them ready and waiting. Ten minutes later Gains and I are still waiting for them to make the schnitzel rolls, so at least they're fresh, but watching the game through the canteen's window, covered by a protective metal grill, is hardly ideal, but useful as training run for when my one remaining working retina decides to give up the ghost.

It was nearly impossible to tell what the hell was going on for those first five or ten minutes, but at least the roll once made was good, even if it wasn't as herbed and spiced as I'd been lead to believe, which could have been another in the long list of life's disappointments, except for the fact that it only costs $6 and chicken schnitzels rolls are usually terrible, having sat in a bain marie for five hours with the crumbing going soggy and the processed chicken tasting like a discarded piece of rubber.

Getting to a game late throws me right off its rhythm, and it took me a little while to realise that Tim Mala had gone off injured in the first five minutes, replaced by Andy Kecojevic who went into midfield while Bonel 'Bones' Obradovic slotted into Mala's right back spot. Apparently we'd been on the back foot early on, but we seemed to have wrested control of this game from that point on.

Now short corners, Yes, we scored off of one, and I tell you one of the reasons this happened - because unlike our usual routines of making it completely obvious that we were going to take a short corner - usually playing to just in front of the corner flag - it was played quickly to the edge of the 18 yard box, where Iqi Jawadi's shot managed to somehow elude everyone and go into the back of the net for hist first goal in an official South game.

Fantastic, great result for both Iqi and short corners. Of course, as Homer Simpson once noted, a short corner is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another short corner! So of course we tried another of these later in the game, same routine and all - unfortunately we coughed the ball up, and because we had over committed players forward, had only ten fit players on the park anyway, Werribee shot the ball down the other end when it would have been better for us to play more conservatively.

But all that happened much later. Nick Epifano who was working hard got fair fair reward for effort when he was fed through on goal and chipped the ball over the keeper with a first time shot. A goal from a short corner and someone scoring for us without needing to take fifteen million touches. What a day this was turning out to be. 2-0 up at the break and all sorts of miraculous things happening. Unfortunately Kristian 'Gonzo' Konstantinidis had to go off with an in jury he picked up late in the first half, and thus Michael Eagar had to go back from defensive mid into centreback.

While we managed to keep creating breaks going forward, we started tiring - a persistent problem which we all hope will be gradually overcome as the season wears on, with us needing to peak later this year rather than right at the start - and Werribee starting winning the midfield battle. Leigh Minopoulos was brought as fresh legs but struggled, Obradovic started to lose his way a bit in his unfamiliar role, and Kecojevic started cramping up with no subs left and 20 odd minutes to play.

The home team scored to make things worse, and if not for Michael Eagar's heroics in defense, clearing time and time again, we wouldn't have been able to hold on for all three points. Even with with Eagar's desperate efforts though, we had to rely on the crossbar to save us in the 94th minute of the game, with the relevant Werribee player first exultant and then devastated that his effort failed to hit the mark.

Very impressive performance by @KecojevicAndy in the @Smfc win today pic.twitter.com/0NWyillyvO
— NPL Vic Football (@NPLVic_Football) March 8, 2015

Considering the injuries we copped, the re-shuffling required, and effectively playing with only ten men for the last 20 minutes or so, I'm stoked we got the three points. Fitness is still an issue for the tine being, but there was more evidence that the team is beginning to gel. I was especially pleased to see how Kecojevic scarcely looked out of place in a senior game.

Next week
We enter the Dockerty Cup - or FFA Cup qualifiers to those of you who are part of the FFV (and lizard people, natch) conspiracy to deflate the importance of the Dockerty Cup. We'll be playing State League 3 team Whittlesea United, who pulled off a 3-2 upset against State League 1's Clifton Hill. The date and time are yet to be confirmed, but this will be an interesting affair not only to see which depth players get more of a go, but also because former South NSL and VPL championship winner, the much loved Tansel Baser, is the Whittlesea United captain.

Teach a man to fish...
There's been a little bit of discussion recently over the FFV's decision to provide video cameras to every NPL club in order for them to film their games and provide the footage for a weekly online compilation. Those on the negative side seem to be of the opinion that as the footage from most of those games comes across as unprofessional, that rather than enhancing the product for luring potential sponsors, it actually damages the game.

I can certainly see the validity in such thinking. The footage provided so far in the NPL1 highlights packages in particular varies from the very good to the abjectly dire. A lot of this is clearly down to who's operating the camera on any given day, and I would have hoped (though I don't know for sure) that merely giving the cameras to the clubs was not the end point, but that FFV may also supplement that with some sort of training. But some of the problems with the quality of the footage fall outside individual camera operators. How many times have even those clubs who have funded their own video productions (South, Knights, Hume, etc) been hampered by the lack of suitable media facilities, such as basic scaffolding creating an elevated vantage point? Or being unable to get clear footage - and this goes for photographers as well - because the lighting isn't up to scratch?

@PaulMavroudis I hate it for the same reason
— Pave Jusup (@PaveJusup) March 8, 2015

While some have called for the hiring of professional videographers to undertake this task, I am of the opposite opinion. By giving the clubs the basic tools - and that would ideally include some training - it provides the opportunity for the clubs and some of their members themselves to learn new skills. This is not merely about outsourcing the problem to someone else, but getting the clubs to take responsibility for their own promotion. The clubs that take the time to make the most of the opportunity will hopefully get the most out of it, while those who don't will mostly be hurting themselves.

Finally, the call for a return of a weekly live video streamed game, while well intentioned, seems to me to miss the point. Regardless of how much you publicise a live stream, the audience will be minuscule unless it's for a very high profile contest, something like last year's FFA Cup games. And whether or not live streaming actually manages to get an audience, the focus at this level of competition should be on getting people to games, paying money at the gate and spending at the canteen. More people at games also creates its own better atmosphere, encouraging people to come back the next time. Few people want to spend a couple of hours at a game with only a bunch of old men and the odd relative of a player; but if more people go to games, it by itself creates a more homely and exciting experience.

Around the grounds
They tried to make me the new Steve from Broady and failed.
The plan was to go with Cuddles to the Pascoe Vale – Northcote game at the revamped CB Smith Reserve with its infamous light tower in front of the grandstand, but when we heard that that Richmond was hosting Nunawading, we decided to head to Kevin Bartlett Reserve instead. The reasoning behind this decision was that we wanted to see whether all the stories about Nunawading – playing out from the back at all times, and not taking any shots – were true, and whether former South player Anthony Giannopoulos – a player who loves to shoot at first sight – would stick out like a sore thumb.

Well when we got to the parking area at Richmond, it started raining, and not wishing to risk having to stand in the rain all game, or hide on the social club, we decided to hoof it to Fawkner instead, and if we missed the first ten minutes, well, we probably wouldn't miss much would we?

Wrong. After slogging through Sydney Road with its pervasive smell of gyros and kebabs, getting through a Friday night booze and drug bus operation that was still setting up, but which had taken out two out of three lanes, and circling around for ten minutes trying to find a parking spot, updates on Twitter, Futbol24 and via a friend already at the ground, we found out that we'd missed not only the first four goals of the game – two each to Pascoe Vale and Northcote, both times the latter equalising – but also Giannopoulos giving Nunawading an early lead.

At least we got to see the fifth goal of the game which gave Northcote the lead for the first time that night. I'm not sure what's going on down there, with Hercules not even managing to get a front of shirt sponsor, but first and foremost it's about scoring goals, and Northcote did that better than Pascoe Vale in a thrilling game which completely died in the arse once Cuddles and I got there. I spent much time next to Kristian Konstantinidis in line at the canteen, and considering the rather good crowd decided to get a cevapi roll instead of wait forever for a pizza. Having finished said cevapi roll however, Andrew Mesorouni's kid and Leo Athanasakis' kid rock up with several boxes of the famous woodfired pizza, and I somehow ended up scoffing down most of one, and being saddled with another. But a man has to know his limits!

It was also to good to finally meet Pascoe Vale president Lou Tona in the flesh, who was surprised that I wasn't fatter. Yes, South of the Border, the Australian soccer blog most dedicated to the cause of the wallflower, can also occasionally find itself among the movers and shakers. But never fear, we are still of the people! For the people! By me, and whoever else wants to write for us! The key to selling out of course is to sell when your price is high. Only time will tell whether a ride to and from Lara and a few boxes of pizza - and a can Pepsi, we can't forget that - was worth the price, or whether I'm just a really cheap date.

Final thought
Those shotput people at Lakeside can heave those balls a fucken long way.

Back With A Vengeance - Kiss of Death, Round 14, 2013

Players come and go but the club remains. This is something people do not understand, or refuse to comprehend. The transfer window is now closed and the player merry-go-round is over. Clubs wheeled and dealed to their heart's content over the last two weeks or so. But who cares really, they’re all mercenaries anyway.

Oakleigh Cannons vs Green Gully Cavaliers @ Jack Edwards @ 8.30pm on Friday
Oakleigh to win this one. They are on the up. Gully is too, but have yet to convince me. Oakleigh 2 – Green Gully Cavaliers 0.

Pascoe Vale vs Port Melbourne Sharks @ Pascoe Vale @ 8.30pm on Friday
I tip a draw for this one. Pascoe is somewhat on the up, and Port is starting to get the shakes. Pascoe Vale 1 – Port Melbourne 1.

Richmond vs Dandy Thunder @ Richmond @ 8.30pm on Friday
Richmond would feel hard done by the FFV’s decision to award Gully the three points for the washed out match which was stopped with 20 or so minutes to go. The FFV continues to disgrace itself with these decisions. Richmond 1 – Dandy Thunder 3.

Hume City vs Southern Stars @ Hume @ 3pm on Sunday
The Turkish derby with a Romanian influence. Hume City 4 – Southern Stars 2.

Melbourne Knights vs Northcote@ Knights Stadium @ 3pm on Sunday
The Knights will finally burst Northcote's bubble. Northcote is hitting the wall slowly but surely. Melbourne Knights 2 – Northcote City 1. Knights to be trailing 0-1 at HT.

South Melbourne vs Bentleigh Greens @ Lakeside @ 3pm on Sunday
Oh how I’d love to beat those morons from Bentleigh. Saw 'em against Dandy last week, nothing spesh. Saw South against Stars last weekend, nothing spesh, lol. Still scratching my head over Rixon's start then subsequent substitution after 30 minutes. Don’t know what's happening there. South Melbourne 3 – Bentleigh Greens 0

Media Hammering
Melbourne's Greek media has been having a go at South Melbourne over the last few weeks. 3XY copped a backhander over it live on air which is always fun to hear. 3XY was taken to task by ‘Leonidas’ of Altona Meadows.

 I know Leonidas. He is a family friend and South diehard which I can remember from way back. He asked the question of the night. “Why does 3XY and Ta Nea never mention South Melbourne Hellas as ‘Ellas’ in its media?". 3XY put up a poor argument in saying that the FFV mentions South Melbourne as South Melbourne, so why shouldn’t 3XY? Leonidas responded with “yes, but you mention Heidelberg as Alexandros, Port Melbourne as Nea Ellas, Northcote as Iraklis, and all the other Greek teams by their well known monikers”. 3XY responded with a deafening silence.

That is where he had them. They agreed to disagree, and then went on to read out the weekend's scores and they mentioned South Melbourne as Ellas. 3XY Radio 0 – Leonidas of Altona Meadows 1.

The week before 3XY claimed that they had been put in a position where they ‘decided to leave Lakeside’. What a load of crap. They stood up on the balcony, and because no one from the board wanted to talk to them on the record, and because the crowd was staring daggers at them, they felt themselves uncomfortable. Well, when you go on air and talk shit, that’s expected to happen. When you play with South Melbourne, you play with fire, and you will get burnt.

Then they were begging for someone from South to call them up. To their surprise, and mine, a South board member finally did. Hats off to Tony Margaritis, who made that call. He put them in their place. Started off by basically telling them, for four years you have waged a campaign against us, and now when there is a ‘scandal’ as you say, you want us to call up. He then went on to tell them that yes, Peter Tsolakis did in fact know the players would be sacked, and yes he did give the OK for it to be done. They back-peddled to a point, and you could hear their throats trembling that once again they had got their facts wrong, and had promoted a story based on rumours. Shambles to say the least. Then Mr. Rombotis called up and pulled the classic line on them. “Has Mr. Stamoulis given you guys permission to discuss South Melbourne on air?”. After doing some of my own research on this, I have been told by numerous people in the know that they had in fact banned South Melbourne from all their media outlets both radio and print. The journalists were instructed to not mention South Melbourne at all. Shambles on all levels.

The one person who is really rubbing up people the wrong way is veteran journalist Elias Donoudis from the Neos Kosmos. Since I cannot find an email address so I can contact you directly, I am putting up a reply to the inaccurate remarks you make on a weekly basis in your column.

Dear Mr Donoudis,

I have been a reader of Neos Kosmos for about 30 years. Namely the sports section, which is where I always begin to read the publication, as for me, sports is the real news of the world. I scratch my head however when I read the following which I have translated, “The current South Melbourne is in no way connected to the South Melbourne Hellas of old”. I still do not understand how someone who has been a sports journalist since Jesus was a child, can misconstrue and mislead your readers into believing this utter trash.

How do you justify your position in that statement? Are you saying that the Heidelberg Alexander of now, is not linked to the Heidelberg Alexander of old? Are you saying the Melbourne Knights of now are not linked to the Melbourne Croatia of old? I cannot fathom how this can be the case. What is the basis of your statement? Do you have an issue with the current South board? Do you have an issue with South Melbourne as a club?

You rarely mention South Melbourne in any articles unless they lose. You should be ashamed of this position you take, because as a youngster I remember you being wined and dined in the social club at Middle Park, and as a grown adult I remember you being wined and dined in the VIP sections of the then Bob Jane Stadium during the NSL days. If we are not good enough for you now because the ‘tzampa’ (freebies) has stopped, then please stop writing shit in your columns.

Concentrate on the other VPL clubs who wine and dine you so they can make your columns. Keep publishing photos of presidents and committee men who wine and dine you across the Greek communities of Melbourne. South Melbourne does not need Mr Donoudis. South Melbourne does not need the Neos Kosmos.

If you would like to reply please email kodvic@gmail.com

I am also happy to meet up with you, minus the wining and dining to discuss this gripe you seem to have so I can try and understand what you are on about.

Regards,

KOD

The only journalist out there worth mentioning is George Karantonis of Southern FM. His program is aired on Tuesday nights from 10pm – 12pm. George goes out of his way to be fair for every team out there. As much as he is pro-South, he is also to give South a battering if need be. However, the difference between him and the other other journos, is that he does his research and gathers the facts before he goes to air. He has never been wrong as far as I know, and usually when he speaks people listen, because they know he has done his research. His talkback is also quality. However, the one thing I’m getting sick of is his affinity with Greek musician John Tikis. My wife informs me that George loves this guy as he is from Mytilene and so is John Tikis. Go figure.

Board Rant
When are we having the EGM for the NPL? We, the members have a right to know what is going on. Why are you lot so silent on that? There is no excuse to not notify the members via EGM that we have made an application. The members decide the application, not a few faceless men. We are a members based club, not a privately owned entity. I cannot wait to sit there chanting ‘sack the board’, when it all goes pear shaped. You were voted in, you can also be voted out!

Social Club. What social club? How about letting us know what is going on? The silence is deafening and the natives are getting restless.

Transfer News
South released Marinos Gasparis to Northcote, and Anthony Giannopoulos to Sunshine Georgies. Why do I mention Anthony when about 90% of you don’t know who he is? Simple really. He has been at South Melbourne from the age of six. He is now 19. He was in the senior squad this year but only made one appearance during the cup tie with Northcote. He is no doubt a rising star. Why South would release him is incomprehensible, considering they are flying the flag for the NPL, and a player like him would be great for the points based system to be introduced. However, in their wisdom they released him on Monday night, and left him in the lurch to find a club by 5pm Wednesday.

Eventually Sunshine Georgies agreed to a trial, liked what they saw, and to no one's surprise Anthony subsequently signed with them. I have always been a fan of the Sunshine Georgies. They have always been a great club when it comes to juniors, and have developed some great players. A friend of mine's cousin is somewhat of a legend at that club, hence the soft spot I have for them. It is disappointing however that South failed dismally.

Any assistance in finding him a club although minimal is disappointing, considering they released him so he could get ‘senior game time’. Usually, another team is already half lined up. They had nothing. This disappoints and somewhat angers me. That is poor to say the least. We have a history of right royally fucking our youth and this just continues that legacy.

I and a lot of other South fans would like to wish Anthony the best of luck at the Sunshine Georgies and hope to see him in the South colours where he rightfully belongs in the near future. Good luck Gia.

Heroes and Villains - South Melbourne 3 Northcote City 2 (after extra time)

This was a game that had nearly everything. It was characterised by open, attacking football from both sides. There were red cards, there was blood, and there were heroes and villains in abundance. And there was even mass confusion on more than one occasion.

There was tension on and off the field, both during and after the game. If you weren't there, or if you left early for whatever strange reason, then you missed one of the more entertaining games you're likely to see this season. The good thing is, I suppose, that you can catch up on at least some of the goodness on SMFC TV.

The other good thing is that we won.

Call of the year so far
Directed towards the Northcote goalkeeper, who was wearing a fluoro green jersey and shorts, with black socks: 'You look like a highlighter!'

A false start of sorts
Northcote launched a free kick into the box, and saw it headed home, for what looked like on first impression a legitimate goal. But the linesman on the far side had raised his flag straight away, and the effort was disallowed. To be honest, I can't really say for sure either way - my hunch however is that it was a goal. I'm not sure the video will be conclusive, but we'll see.


Taken from Shauen Kelly's Twitter feed.


There will be blood
While the officiating was often pedantic, some of the players didn't do themselves any favours. Shaun Kelly's head was busted open halfway through the first half, and blood poured forth from the wound. He soldiered on, with the kind of bandaging that every well proper central defender wears with pride. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to continue, and was soon replaced by Matko Budimir.

That wasn't the end of the carnage though. About 30 minutes in, Alan Kearney, having his first start after several weeks off with injury - although he did come off the bench last week - was sent off for an off the ball incident with a Northcote player, who was also sent off.

Northcote were the better side in the opening half, and seemed to adjust to the more open spaces better than South, often finding wide men in space. This was especially so on our left hand side. Any hope of surviving until halftime at 0-0 and then re-organising went out the window when Northcote justly opened the scoring, with Milos Lujic tucking away the mess of South's attempt to clear their lines.

The second half
It's fair to say that we were the better team for the majority of the match from this point onward. This is not to discredit Northcote, who still kept looking for their second goal, but the stats in this case are perhaps a little misleading. While we didn't get that many shots on goal, the fact is that we should have. Our counter attacks in particular went unrewarded so often that it was maddening. Our refusal to shoot was only part of the problem - the major issue was not even being able to hit a proper cross where a striker could run on to it. The balls into the box would elude literally everyone, like, literally. 

At last though, Rhys Meredith cut in and curled his shot around the keeper from the right, and it was 1-1, and the game's momentum was clearly with us. We kept peppering away, and subs were even made before the 85th minute -Trent Rixon off and Andy Vlahos on turned out to be a pretty important decision. Fernando De Moraes also got onto the field, to a massive cheer from the faithful, though I'm not sure if he or the coaching staff were expecting him to end up playing 50 minutes rather than a pinch hit 20 at the end.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times
I reckon Peter Gavalas has had a very good season. So much so, it's like having an entirely new recruit. And in this game, he actually played well, coming off his line and making some fancy diving saves, until late on during regular time when he tried being way too fancy at exactly the wrong place and time. His attempt to play around James Kalafatidis failed dismally, and gifted Northcote the easiest of finishes for 2-1.

At that point we were all having horrible flashbacks to 2012. Thankfully, for everyone's sake, Andy Vlahos, probably the shortest player on the field, somehow got onto the end of a free kick launched into the box and headed it home. And believe it or not, that's when this game started getting really interesting.

And it finishes 2-2, we'll see you again next week...
A lot of people at the game didn't seem to realise that this was a cup match, and that as a cup match in the modern era, we were not going to have an infinite amount of replays until we had a winner. Maybe some people were walking out to have a cigarette, or put some extra coins into the parking meter, but somehow I very much doubt it.

Fence runs ain't what they used to be. Photo: Gains.

Great, who's he going to cross it to...
... because to me it seemed like there was no one in the area waiting for the pass. And then Brad Norton, perhaps my favourite much maligned South player of recent times, appears to me as if he's come out of nowhere to put it away and give us the lead for the first time in this match. Cue a fence run of all things, with people running out of the grandstand to revive this once great tradition.
And then the scoreboard shenanigans started. Among the many mistakes - which included an out of synch match clock and listing all the South scorers as 'Goal' - was having Northcote leading 3-2. It did confuse one of the South fans near us who had gone out for a smoke.

There were five in the bed, and the little one said...
This cup tournament allows you to make up to to five substitutions, which is a bizarre sort of situation. It did lead however to Anthony Giannopoulos finally making his senior debut. Long time readers of this blog will recall us banging on about giving this kid a go to the point where people got absolutely fed up, and then we stopped doing it for the good of everyone. 

Fix the scoreboard! Photo: Gains.

 Now I admit that I do know the lad, although I only see him on match days, when he greets me with a 'hey, Juniper', which then leads into a Hattrick discussion. While we've never believed he's been the best thing since sliced bread, all of us of a certain ilk at South Melbourne who have watched him for years, both in underage competitions and at Clarendon Corner social football, are stoked that he's finally reached this milestone, playing for the club he loves.

We're just as glad that he didn't get sent off - though it was nervous times when he while standing over a fallen opponent and giving him the death stare!

Post match follies
Did Peter Gavalas flip the bird at the supporters, or was he putting his hand up in acknowledgement of his blunder? Who do we play next, is it Preston? Don't know for the former. Yes to the latter. Waiting for all conmspiracy theorists to appear in 3... 2... 1...

New segment!
One of our readers, identifying themselves only as 'Manny', has sent us this comic as a first offering. Now he's not promising that it will be a regular feature, but I'm glad that someone with the even merest hint of an artistic bent has offered us their services. That brings the current number of regular contributors on this blog up to four, which is kinda insane when you think about it. Any good suggestions about what to call this series are also welcome. It was sent to us last week, so if it feels a little out of date, that's completely our fault.

Around the grounds
I was at the Clifton Park synthetic pitch on Saturday afternoon. Somehow the Moreland City - Clifton Hill match was only the second best cup classic I got to see this week. Footage by Football Chaos. By the way, while I've not seen much of Clifton Hill's goalkeeper Mason Interlandi, what I have seen of him suggest to me that he won't be a state league 2 keeper for too much longer.



Tonight
The Socceroos play Jordan at Docklands. Myself and Gains will be at the opposite end of the stadium to the newly formed and FFA approved Australian home end group 'Terra Australis', but if you do somehow see us in the crowd, do come and say hello.

Next week
Melbourne Knights at home. There's talk that some chap named Ljubo might be starting for them.

Final thought

Congrats to @smfc today, a great game. Well done to our boys, ready to get back on track in the #VPL this weekend! #Northcote
— Northcote City FC (@NorthcoteCity) June 10, 2013

South of the Border Awards 2012

Here are my crappy awards for 2012. I'll also be providing forecasts as to the winners of the 2022 season with my Nostradamus like powers based on the assumption that the National Competitions Review as put forward by the FFV gets up and going.

Player of the year: Dimi Tsiaras. Brad Norton could have won it for inexplicably playing more games then everyone sans Peter Gavalas. Luke Byles would have probably won it if I used a week by week voting system. But Tsiaras when he was playing at defensive mid, seemed to add a bit of cunt to the side. More of him in that position next season please, and less of him pinch hitting in defense as was asked of him in 2012.

2022 winner: Alain Prost Montgomery Trent Spoffington de Beaufort, the latest superstar out of the Xavier/Scotch/St Kevins etc 'my parents were loaded and I play football for South Melbourne' program.

Under 21 player of the year: The Cliff Hussey Memorial Trophy goes to Anthony Giannopoulos. Andrew Cartanos showed something in his stints at the end of the season; I liked Matko Budimir more as the year went on; Nicky Jacobs season was cruelly cut short the week after he bundled in the winner against Southern Stars. But bias propels me to pick 'Gia'. Last year his attitude and leadership qualities stank. This year, he's come along in leaps and bounds in both areas, and he appears to be a less selfish player. I was immensely disappointed he didn't get a run at all in the seniors in 2012.

2022 winner : We won't have under 21s by then. In the words of TISM, if you're not famous by fourteen, you're finished.

Goal of the year: 2012 was a very lean year for spectacular goals at South. So in that spirit, the award goes to Anthony Giannopoulos, for his amazing and sadly not caught on camera scissor against Oakleigh. He could have controlled it, he could have headed it, instead he went for the ridiculous and pulled it off.

2022 winner: After a 55 pass build up, James Spanos Junior, Esq. - inspired by watching Alessandro Del Piero during his Sydney FC stint - will nonchalantly curl one into the top corner.

Best performance: I would have said Oakleigh at home, where we dominated 88 of the 90 minutes, but I preferred Oakleigh away all the way back in round two. After getting beaten up for 30 minutes and being behind, we spent a good hour playing blistering football which made us all think we were due for big things in 2012.

2022 winner : It'll all depend on the KNVB methodology number crunchers.

Best away game of the year: Southern Stars. The chaos when Nicky Jacobs scored the winner was fun.

2022 winner: The Battle of Painkalac Dam against the Elwood City Grebes at the Moggs Creek gala day. Can't wait.

Call of the year: Lot of sadly memorable mentions, mostly originating from the mouth of Steve from Broady - 'the things that keep you up at night', 'get it in the mixer', 'what's for dinner'. But the clear winner had to be 'if they were at Northcote, they would have scored that', said by just about everyone, and by me even in cases and places where relevance was minimal.

2022 winner: In order to facilitate a 'fun, safe and positive environment for our children', all wit, including the sarcastic, withering, snide, sly, offbeat, cynical, existential and beatnik, will be prohibited.

Chant of the year: A few to choose from, but 'quack, quack, quack' from the Mighty Ducks takes the win this season

2022 winner: South Melbourne! (clap, clap, clap) South Melbourne! (clap, clap, clap)

Best after match dinner location: Technically, it was a pre-match dinner location, but Thai Deli on Clarendon Street (next door to the abominable Pizza Hut) was fabulous. Hope be there again soon - being closed on Sundays does make it harder to get there though.

2022 winner : Ontbijtkoek paired with Sisi.

Friends we lost along the way: Clarendon Corner, apparently. I wouldn't write them off so quickly though.

2022 winner : There will be no friends, only parents, and even then, only sometimes.

Barely related to anything highlight of the year: During driveway cricket at Southpole's house, bowling alleged cricket superstar Steve from Broady out for a first ball duck.

2022 winner : Sadly, the above will probably still be the highlight of my miserable existence.

Alphabet Soup - Melbourne Knights 2 South Melbourne 2

Didn't deserve to win, didn't deserve to lose. Out of that we somehow got a draw. There was controversy, lots of goals, bit of niggle, and yet it just didn't do something for me. Maybe I can sense the end of the season is coming for us, and I'm already subconsciously getting ready for it.

Anthony Giannopoulos
Still can't catch a break.

Baggio played for South!
But not the one you're thinking of.

Clarendon Corner
Going, going...

Derby
If a derby gets played in the woods (or the back blocks of Sunshine) and no one notices, did it actually happen?

English Premier League
Starts again this week, or so they tell me. Shoot me before my Facebook page gets cluttered with mostly Grecian Geezers (and I'm not referring to Exeter City fans).

Fernando De Moraes
Early in the second half he was provided with the best cross we've made since the 1999 NSL grand final, and we all thought it was in. It wasn't. Anyone else and we would have expected that.

Glen Trifiro
Does he even give a shit any more?

Heidelberg United
Sad that their troubles are the only thing we can smile about this season.

If We Are To Make The Finals...
My guess is that we'll have to get ten points from the remaining twelve. I think we'll fail at the first hurdle this week at home against Dandenong, but I would love to be proven wrong. PROVE ME WRONG BOYS! PROVE ME WRONG!

Joe Montemurro
Anyone notice anything different while he was coaching the last two weeks?

Kevin 'Power Trip' Docherty
Good on him for giving that red card to the Knights player, even if the players involved thought nothing much of the incident. Stupid and pointless act by the player in question.

Low Flying Aircraft
The view from Knights Stadium is good, but not quite up to the helicopters landing at Moorabbin Airport during a game at Kingston Heath.

Marinos Gasparis - Man For A Crisis
Apparently going off to Greece (mate's wedding) and will miss the next three games or so. Great stuff.

Nick Jacobs
Broke his leg while playing school football. Get well soon, champ.

Olympic Games
Thank Lucifer that crap is over. Now we can focus on sports we actually like again.

Pigeonhole Key

That's me next to David Hicks. We had some good times.

I think the reason that Victoria University and their crack security squad is stalling on this, is because I actually am a security threat. Hopefully my apology for chucking The New Citizen and other Larouchian propaganda into everyone's pigeonhole will be seen as sincere.

Quote of the Month
From our old acquaintance Mercs, who doesn't come around anymore, but whose blog we read for reminders that there are sporting clubs almost as fucked as ours, and for work like this.


You'd never turn back a win (well, you might if it was 2009 and SNIP - legal department) but a victory of this variety was a bit like on-screen nudity before the internet came along. Back in say 1992 you didn't know when you were going to see norgs again so anything looked good.

Ražniči
Not the best thing I've ever eaten at the soccer, but not the worst either, and great value at $6 with cabbage and onion! And service that was atypically cheerful for Knights Stadium.

Social Club
They tell me that they've finally and actually moved the stuff that me, Steve from Broady, Mr Valkanis, Polish Nick, Ryan the Intern (and possibly assorted others) put into boxes out of there, and into storage. Maybe we will get the

Twitter
I am now officially a Twit. Check me out at @PaulMavroudis, though I probably won't have much, if anything to say. How does this crap even work?

Unidentified Vehicle
Starting beeping me on Ballarat Road, no idea who they were, what they wanted, whether they were sticking their finger up at me, whether my white South hoodie was actually a Collingwood one. I just tried to concentrate on getting to the ground in one piece by focusing on the road.

Victoria University Students
Plenty of time to sink piss. Not enough time to read a couple of articles.

Worlds of Football Conference 2012
I've submitted my abstract - will they allow me to present a paper? Or will I have to go back to reporting only on everyone else's papers? Interesting factoid about that piece - despite being just about the most high brow piece on here, it still ranks as one of the most visited pages on this site. Not too bad considering it isn't a Hellenic Cup or Jim Marinis piece.

Xenophon
The most delightful of all music, that of your own praises.

Young Wife
Because the Government does not favour the entry of foreign women, New Australians are often men without wives; hence unfulfilled desire reinforces love of country. There is no night life worth mentioning, no corso, no processions. In other words there is nothing, though it’s a comfortable nothing. Bored and frustrated, the New Australian is permitted to express himself once every seven days for twice forty minutes (sic) at the soccer match (Martin 1966: 152)

Zenith
People still think we're not a VPL club. How cute.

Gimme Shelter - Kiss of Death, Round 17, 2012

Friday 8:15 PM Bentleigh Greens (4th) vs Dandenong Thunder (1st)
Bentleigh put four past the Knights, while Dandenong had a 3-1 win against Northcote. Should be an interesting match. Bentleigh have the second best attack, while Dandy have the best defence. I don’t think Bentleigh will be good enough to beat Dandy however. Bentleigh Greens 1 – Dandy Thunder 3.

Friday 8:30 PM Oakleigh Cannons (2nd) vs Southern Stars (10th)
Oakleigh had a tin ass 2-3 win at Richmond while Southern Stars copped two goals in injury time to lose 2-3 against South Melbourne. I saw Oakleigh at Richmond last week. Not much chop. Southern Stars play anti-football and Oakleigh will be too good for them. Oakleigh Cannons 2 – Southern Stars 1.

Saturday 3:00 PM Green Gully Cavaliers (3rd) vs Richmond (7th)
Gully had an easy 1-2 away win at Moreland, and Richmond somehow lost to Oakleigh 2-3. Gully will win this one as Dobbo usually starts preparing his team for finals football around about now. Green Gully 2 – Richmond 0.

Saturday 3:00 PM Northcote City (5th) vs Moreland (11th)
Northcote lost 3-1 at Dandy and Moreland lost 2-1 at home to Gully. Both these teams are in negative goal difference, so they’re both pretty much a mixed bag with Moreland being pretty shit. Northcote should do the job on them, but I need a draw. Northcote City 2 – Moreland Zebras 2.

Saturday 3:00 PM Heidelberg United (12th) vs Melbourne Knights (9th)
Heidelberg lost 3-1 away at Hume, and the Knights got drilled a new one 0-4 against Bentleigh. Heidelberg has won one game all season in the VPL and that was against the Knights (not forgetting they also eliminated the Knights from the cup - Ed). The loss to Bentleigh came out of left field for the Knights, and some feathers might’ve been ruffled midweek at training. Who knows. Heidelberg will double their wins tally this season with a win over the Knights. Heidelberg 2 – Melbourne Knights 1.

Nicky Jacobs fronts up for the post-match interview

Sunday 5:00 PM South Melbourne (8th) vs Hume City (6th)
I’m still on a high from last week's come from behind 2-3 win by South against the Southern Stars. To be trailing 2-1 in the 91st and to have Steve Burton equalise was enough for me. Then in the 94th to have young Nicky Jacobs header in the winner was heart attack territory. Scenes of pandemonium, broken umbrellas, people hugging each other, slipping on the grassy knolls, jumpers and jackets being thrown to the ground in sheer elation, were scenes that haven’t been witnessed at a Hellas match since the time we beat Sydney Croatia at Middle Park after trailing 0-1 for the whole match. That day it was Angie Goutzioulis with a header that gave us the 2-1 win in the 91st. Total chaos. The team played well I thought, considering the absentees, Gus made the right subs at the right time, and it paid off. Southern Stars were pretty bad, but they hit the lead twice with basically two counter attacks. Gasparis had probably his game of the season, and Fernando looks like he’s back to his normal self again. Burton for me was best on ground. But, I still don’t understand why we persist in playing him with his back to goal. He’s a player that should be played through onto goal. Hence how he got the equaliser in the 91st. Nicky Jacobs did well when he came on. A few nervy touches to start off with, then out of nowhere he pops up with the winner in the 94th. All good for the young boy, but I think everyone should just calm down a notch. The step up from the youth to the senior team is bigger than people think. I’m not saying the youngsters didn’t do well when they came on, but all I'm saying is that they can’t be thrown straight into the deep end because they play well in the under 21’s. Would I start with the same eleven against Hume. Most likely not. If I have players to replace Norton and Petreski with, then I will replace them. I’m sick of hammering Norton. Petreski is good, but not at left back. With Dimi Tsiaris due back and I think Matthews (?) this week, then I’d slot them straight in. Would I have Jacobs on the bench for another stint? Definitely. If he can be rewarded with another 15-20 min experience in a senior match, it will do more good than harm, and Gus must be encouraged to start doing this if the senior players don’t look interested at training. Why wouldn’t you reward players who trained well and who will give you what they have? A youth player who was suspended last week is young Anthony Giannopoulos, better known as ‘Gia', who in my eyes should be on the senior bench week in/week out. He is the captain of the youth team, and probably their top scorer, and has scored most likely the goal of the season against Oakleigh a few weeks ago. He has been at South all his playing life, has passion, is a member of the club, and boy can he play. Any spots on the bench should be filled by him as a minimum. Hopefully he is given this opportunity soon, and he scores for the club he has grown to love. The celebrations should be AWOL. There is a new aura around South after the 2-3 against the Stars, and I see us making a late charge for the finals. Hold onto your hats people. South Melbourne 3 – Hume City 0.

Admin and general whinging.

• SMFC should’ve ordered replacement umbrellas by this weeks match. I counted 4 absolutely gone after Jacobs winner.
• Richmond Eagles. How about you guys seriously get some cover. Against Oakleigh I got absolutely soaked. FFV needs to investigate this. Plenty of rule breaches.

2012 Rules of Competition. Pg.49.

Section 3 – Spectator Amenities

Undercover seating

3.6 Undercover spectator seating for 500 people must be provided.

Public Address system

3.7 A fully functional Public Address (PA) system must be provided. The PA must be clearly audible to all parts of the venue, including social areas and operated on match day to make announcements to introduce players, announce scorers and provide emergency instructions to patrons.

Public toilets

3.1.1 Two toilet blocks must be provided for both male and female patrons (each section having a minimum of two cubicles) situated not more than 50 metres from the playing field.

Also, your facility is unsafe as fuck when it comes to buying a ticket.

Over and out.