Sunday, 27 September 2009

Cheap photocopies held together by staples

The other day I was looking through someone's book on the history of English match day programmes - Match Day: Official Football Programmes by Bob Stanley (of St Etienne and NME fame). I love that old retro, colour drained look, much as I love the look of old Pelicans/Penguins from the era.

Anyway, it got me thinking again about doing a South fanzine. It'd come out every home game - quite optimistic I know, but why not aim high? Hell why not aim even higher and go for every home and away game? Ok, maybe too high. And it'd have all sorts of regular and irregular segments, whatever we could come up with.

The 'we' is inevitably the problem though - it could just be me doing all the work, but it would become a drain - and I would rather have multiple voices and multiple talents. I am a pluralist after all. Whatever stupid gripe, drawing, anecdote, penchant, whatever - which of course, once again, was the point of this thing sort of, but this is also news and reportage and smfcboard exasperation safehouse.

In keeping with the retro feel there'd be a classic three column layout, colour cover, black and white for the rest, naff sponsors (we'd make them up if we had to) maybe some cartoons - in short, all the things I wanted this thing to be. Produce a maximum of 50 copies, photocopy most of it, staple it together, charge something minimal, ask for donations or nothing at all. It all depends on the printing costs of course.

As for a title? Names are the easy bit. Already knocked out a few with our friend Southpole. The title of course would be in italics, and preferably be not completely in joke related, and have room for an exclamation mark in there.

  • 25 Albert Road Drive
  • Singing by the Lake
  • Sack The Board!
  • Late Merchandise!
  • Sack The Fans!
  • Bill's Punjab Express!
  • Greeksta and the Cloneasaurus
  • Heaps Good!
  • Leaving early to watch Big Brother

Of course there were a few other unmentionable ones. For the record I liked Late Merchandise!, Sack The Board! and Bill's Punjab Express! the most. If - and it's a big if, of course - I was to get this going, it'd need a fair bit of prep work. Like this in the beginning, it'd need a backlog of articles and segments ready to go. And the support of my peers. And a willingness to stick it to the man. We'll see I guess.

Tuesday, 22 September 2009

Final Pumpkin Seed Eaters podcast of 2009

I can't be arsed doing an intro for it today, so here's their spiel verbatim.

Believe it or not, the Pumpkin Seed Eaters are finally back for their first show in over 3 months...and final show for the year!!! Slack, we know! Anyway, on this week's show, we will we reviewing the 2009 VPL season and handing out some awards of our own! There will also be a few of our regular segments, including Mail Bag and Media Watch, during which we discuss the progress of the A-League as well as dissect the FFA's World Cup bid. Aussies Abroad also makes a return to the show, during which we head to the shores of South-East Asia where we hope lies a happy finish for a prospective Socceroo who is currently plying his trade in Vietnam!

Friday, 18 September 2009

So I was reading the Neos Kosmos yesterday...

... and it said that the South members vote on the stadium deal/MOU will be held at the club's AGM in late November. How about that. Killing two birds with one stone on the one hand, but it'll make that day go even longer. Still, probably saves money on the mailouts.

Four South players receive state team call up.

Congratulations to Joseph Youssef, Ramazan Tavsancioglu, Steven O'Dor and Laura Spiranovic have all been selected to represent Victoria in the 125th anniversary matches to be played up in Newcastle against a Northern New South Wales Soccer Federation side. Too bad the poor soccer folk down here in Victoria can't get to see a Victorian state team take the field on their own turf unless it's to provide scouting opportunities for the Victory.

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

So when do we get to vote on it?

By we, I mean voting rights members. And by it, I mean the MOU that's been signed with the government in regards to the Lakeside redevelopment. They tell us soon, and I hope that it is so. I believe that the agreement will be something quite special. If you want to read the club's spiel, head here.

Sunday, 13 September 2009

Michalokopoulos gaaaaaaawwn!

Peladrinos too. Fell or pushed? Don't know. New guy? If he exists, no one's told me. They just don't trust me anymore for some reason. Might have something to do with inadvertently starting 'the chaos'. Good luck to the boys in their future endeavours, unless they're against us of course. But that aside, Michalokopoulos played an important part in reversing the club's fortunes. After 7 round last year, we were relegation bound, looking doomed. By the end, there was something to latch on to. It carried forth into this year, with the Hellenic Cup win, some good signings, and a 10 match unbeaten streak. Somewhere along the line, as mentioned previously on this blog, it came unstuck. Form went out the window, strange substitutions were being made and the goalkeeping situation still hadn't sorted itself out. The coach can't score tap ins nor make regulation catches, but at some level the buck eventually stops with him.

Notes from the 2009 Grand Final

I was convinced by the opportunity to catch up with a few South fans - as well as my media pass granting me free entry - to turn up to this yesterday. Dandenong Thunder had streaked the league, four or so games clear by the end, but that counts for nothing when you have finals. Their opponents wee Altona Magic, defending champs, third grand final in four seasons - never having finished first on the table though in any of those years.

There was plenty to see and a few surprises as well. Altona Magic's main cash cow Melissa Fischer-Massa came out of hiding - she's been scarcely seen at a VPL venue since allegations of the abysmal financial state of her nursing homes came to light. The Albanian contingent seemed in reasonably strong presence, air horns and all. The Magic's fans had some presence, but mostly elderly and as usual a small group of young people for whom this is probably their first Magic game of the season.

As per usual, the PA system at Lakeside was a mess - the national anthem was half done before anyone realised it was on. Now, I'm not a huge fan of national flags and anthems, ut I don't believe there was any disrespect meant by people not singing or standing to attention - and besides, isn't that what's so great about a country like Australia? That we don't have to have guns at our heads making us pay our respects? It used to be like that I reckon, but perhaps my memory is faulty. The next surprise was the start of the 'Vou-vou-voulgari' and 'Tsi-tsi-tsigani' chants from the Albanians directed towards the Magic fans. A Heidelberg fan next to me attempted to note the irony of it all.

The game itself was lacking in any sort of cohesive quality. There was at best, an implied edge, that there was something bigger than three points on the line, but the game never really lifted in tempo or quality throughout its torturous 120 minutes plus several stoppages for injuries. The Thunder took the lead in the 2nd half, a saved shot ricocheting into the path of Thunder's captain who headed home. Altona leveled from the penalty spot, after a long range shot hit the arm of a defender. The young Magic fans bring out their ethnic flags, and the police and security move in, eventually. Reports soon spread that a guy had collapsed in the stands. The medics worked hard to revive him - and they do - but ultimately it is to no avail; he doesn't pull through. Three ambulances turned up in total. For some it put the game in perspective - it is just a game after all. But the game went on.

The penalty shootout saw the Thunder fans move behind the goal, and that's when the flare show started, and the FFV brought out the receipt book. If a flare lit is worth a $1k fine, then that's $7k at least that Dandenong will have to find from somewhere. At least a couple of flares were thrown back into the grassy area behind the scoreboard, which started a small grass fire. South board member George Koukoulas added Fireman Sam to his list of roles played at the club by putting out the fire with a fire extinguisher from inside the social club. The fire brigade turned up eventually, but they didn't have much to do. Bottles were also thrown from the grandstand onto the field.

After the game, the Thunder contingent left peacefully - leaving pretty much no one on hand to witness the Magic raising their fifth Victorian championship cup. A couple of us inspected the damage after the show, taking photos for the benefit of the FFV who'll have to pay up for it. Quite a few grandstand seats damaged in the sections the vocal Thunder fans were in, as well as some damage behind the goals where they'd moved for the penalty shootout. It's not the final game at Lakeside as we know it, but we're getting there.

Thursday, 10 September 2009

Know Your Clubs - Olympic

Alright then, special treat for everyone today - everyone that is who didn't see this when I posted it on smfcboard last week. Courtesy of 4Flares, the following is a club profile on Melbourne's Olympic, one of South Melbourne Hellas's predeccessors.

A lot of names, some of which are apparently also related to Apollo Athletic, as stated in the article. From the little cross referencing I've been able to do so far I've been able to find that

  • The late Nick Spartels was likely a boxer in the 1920s
  • From another edition of Soccer News: Hector Hernandez, inside-left for Olympic, would be the only Mexican playing soccer in Australia. A Batchelor of Commerce, he is over here on a scholarship from the Mexican Government for the next two years, during which he hopes to obtain his Master of Commerce.
  • We now know for certain that the Marmaras Cup was between the Olympics of Adelaide and Melbourne. The Melbourne and Sydney Hakoahs had a similar trophy they'd play for.
  • (Sir) Eugene Gorman was a well known barrister in the first half 20th century Melbourne. The Greek Consul bit referred was an honorary title.
  • In another 'Know Your Clubs' section, Park Rangers are mentioned as having been born off a split from the South Melbourne United Juniors in 1946. A Dockerty Cup winner, Park Rangers played in the Middle Park area for quite some years, before being taken over by a bunch of Scots (as mentioned to me by Hugh Murney) and moving to Kew. Later they became absorbed into what is now Moreland City. Does that make us related somehow? Up to you I guess.

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

Gold Medal Night Results for South

Laura Spiranovic finished runner up to the eventual winner in the Women's Premier League. Ross Thomson of Hume won the men's award with 25 votes. The best placed South players was... Fernando De Moraes, If I had a malfunctioning air-conditioner and a hat, we would be able to recreate the classic skit form the Fallout Boy episode of The Simpsons.

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

The other smfcboard

This is how much I'm procrastinating. Got a ton of stuff to do, and yet why do that when you can waste a few seconds by going into the profile section of the forum and changing the forum theme to subSilver from Cobalt 2.0. There's also another one called JustFooty, a horrible and hard to look at green(!) and white concoction.

Sunday, 6 September 2009

South women lose 4-2 in prelim against Bergers

3-0 down after 15 minutes. Game as good as done right there. Did not look at all likely up front in the first half, and everyone else seemed asleep. Second half had a chance to pull it back to 3-1, but instead went 4-0 down. Two consolation goals were the final chapter in an otherwise very good season after so many years of struggle.

Thursday, 3 September 2009

The collision of a wish with an unyielding reality

There are certain times when it is useful to return to the musings of people who have been through this before and had a decent think about it. Alain De Botton's look at Seneca is quite useful, pop-philosophy though it might be.

Seneca was a philosopher of the Roman Empire. He noticed that at the heart of every frustration lies a basic structure: the collision of a wish with an unyielding reality. We attain wisdom by learning not to aggravate the world’s obstinacy through spasms of rage, self-pity, anxiety, bitterness, self-righteousness and paranoia.

What makes us angry are dangerously optimistic notions about what the world and other people are like. How badly we react to frustration is critically determined by what we think of as normal. We will cease to be so angry once we cease to be so hopeful.

Reality comprises two cruelly confusing characteristics. We are invited to assume that tomorrow will be much like today. Yet there is a possibility that we will meet an appalling event after which nothing will ever be the same again.

When one suffers disaster, one is unable to fit the event into a scheme of justice. One alternates between a feeling that one may after all have been bad, and the feeling that one has fallen victim to a failure in the administration of justice. The belief that the world is fundamentally just is implied in the very complaint that there has been an injustice. It is based on a picture of a moral universe where external circumstances reflected internal qualities.

Frustration, anger, shock, and the sense of injustice are caused by an incorrect paradigm of the world. Wisdom lies in correct discerning where we are free to mould reality according to our wishes, and where must accept the unalterable with tranquility. Reason allows us to determine when our wishes are in irrevocable conflict with reality, and then bids us to submit ourselves willingly, rather than angrily or bitterly, to necessities. We may be powerless to alter certain events, but we remain free to choose our attitude towards them. It is in our spontaneous acceptance of necessity that we find our distinctive freedom. Seneca recommended this formula:

[The wise] will start each day with the thought…

Fortune gives us nothing which we can really own. Nothing, whether public or private, is stable; the destinies of men, no less than those of cities are in a whirl. Whatever structure has been reared by a long sequence of years, at the cost of great toil and through the great kindness of the gods, is scattered and dispersed in a single day.

No, he who has said “a day” has granted too long a postponement to swift isfortune; an hour, an instant of time, suffices for the overthrow of empires. How often have cities in Asia, how often in Achaia, been laid low by a single shock of earthquake? How many towns in Syria, how many in Macedonia, have been swallowed up? How often has this kind of devastation laid Cyprus in ruins?

We live in the middle of things which have been destined to die. Mortal have you been born, to mortals have you given birth. Reckon on everything, expect everything.

Details for women's preliminary final

Just for the record, I ain't on the women's team mailing list, nor do I get a retainer from the government to spruik its Lakeside redevelopment plans, I've never been paid for any of my three or so articles on Neos Kosmos English Weekly and no one really tells me anything anymore that I'm allowed to tell you until everyone else can know it at the same time as well. I can't even be suitably cryptic without getting in trouble with the chocolate cake eaters.

But now over to Niki Cook from the women's team ruling cabal, Gang of Four etc. One of my lecturers, tutors, supervisors, Svengalis this semester, John Weldon (who knew at least one of Guy Garvey's sisters back in Bury, zomg) made a reference to the Gang Of Four to people in my performance writing class who were all likely between the ages of 18-20, and unfamiliar with either the band or the Chinese Communist Party political faction said band were named after. Don't worry, I had a word to him about it.

Hello all

After a game of heart-stopping excitement last Saturday, our Senior team defeated Sandringham 3-2 in extra time, and has progressed to the WPL Preliminary Final. Victory in this game would put the team in the Grand Final, which is a fantastic achievement.

The Preliminary Final takes place on Sunday morning (6th September), and it will be held at Bob Jane Stadium. Kick off is 11am.

Once again, we would love your support, it was amazing last week to hear the crowd cheering us on, it really made a difference.

Entry to the game is free.

The event flyer is attached.

Hope to see you there,


Tuesday, 1 September 2009

Fernando youtube video stats courtesy of Gains

Our buddy Gains posted the following data on smfcboard, noting perhaps indirectly at the irony of 500 people being at the game while nearly 275,000 hits have been registered for it online. This is all for the month of August - remembering that the clip wasn't even uploaded until the 15th August.

#1 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#6 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Australia
#6 - Top Favorited (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#14 - Top Rated (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#21 - Most Discussed (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#43 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Sports
#73 - Top Favorited (This Month) - Australia
#78 - Most Responded (This Month) - Sports - Australia