Friendly Reminder

Cheap photocopies held together by staples

The other day I was looking through someone's book on the history of English match day programmes - Match Day: Official Football Programmes by Bob Stanley (of St Etienne and NME fame). I love that old retro, colour drained look, much as I love the look of old Pelicans/Penguins from the era.

Anyway, it got me thinking again about doing a South fanzine. It'd come out every home game - quite optimistic I know, but why not aim high? Hell why not aim even higher and go for every home and away game? Ok, maybe too high. And it'd have all sorts of regular and irregular segments, whatever we could come up with.

The 'we' is inevitably the problem though - it could just be me doing all the work, but it would become a drain - and I would rather have multiple voices and multiple talents. I am a pluralist after all. Whatever stupid gripe, drawing, anecdote, penchant, whatever - which of course, once again, was the point of this thing sort of, but this is also news and reportage and smfcboard exasperation safehouse.

In keeping with the retro feel there'd be a classic three column layout, colour cover, black and white for the rest, naff sponsors (we'd make them up if we had to) maybe some cartoons - in short, all the things I wanted this thing to be. Produce a maximum of 50 copies, photocopy most of it, staple it together, charge something minimal, ask for donations or nothing at all. It all depends on the printing costs of course.

As for a title? Names are the easy bit. Already knocked out a few with our friend Southpole. The title of course would be in italics, and preferably be not completely in joke related, and have room for an exclamation mark in there.

• CMON HELLAS! FORZA! HELLAS!
  
• 25 Albert Road Drive
• Singing by the Lake
  
• Sack The Board!
  
• Late Merchandise!
• Sack The Fans!
• Bill's Punjab Express!
• Greeksta and the Cloneasaurus
• Heaps Good!
• Leaving early to watch Big Brother

Of course there were a few other unmentionable ones. For the record I liked Late Merchandise!, Sack The Board! and Bill's Punjab Express! the most. If - and it's a big if, of course - I was to get this going, it'd need a fair bit of prep work. Like this in the beginning, it'd need a backlog of articles and segments ready to go. And the support of my peers. And a willingness to stick it to the man. We'll see I guess.

Final Pumpkin Seed Eaters podcast of 2009

I can't be arsed doing an intro for it today, so here's their spiel verbatim.

Believe it or not, the Pumpkin Seed Eaters are finally back for their first show in over 3 months...and final show for the year!!! Slack, we know! Anyway, on this week's show, we will we reviewing the 2009 VPL season and handing out some awards of our own! There will also be a few of our regular segments, including Mail Bag and Media Watch, during which we discuss the progress of the A-League as well as dissect the FFA's World Cup bid. Aussies Abroad also makes a return to the show, during which we head to the shores of South-East Asia where we hope lies a happy finish for a prospective Socceroo who is currently plying his trade in Vietnam!

http://podcast.pumpkinseedeaters.com/PumpkinSeedEaters-2009Episode5.mp3

So I was reading the Neos Kosmos yesterday...

... and it said that the South members vote on the stadium deal/MOU will be held at the club's AGM in late November. How about that. Killing two birds with one stone on the one hand, but it'll make that day go even longer. Still, probably saves money on the mailouts.

Four South players receive state team call up.

Congratulations to Joseph Youssef, Ramazan Tavsancioglu, Steven O'Dor and Laura Spiranovic have all been selected to represent Victoria in the 125th anniversary matches to be played up in Newcastle against a Northern New South Wales Soccer Federation side. Too bad the poor soccer folk down here in Victoria can't get to see a Victorian state team take the field on their own turf unless it's to provide scouting opportunities for the Victory.

So when do we get to vote on it?

By we, I mean voting rights members. And by it, I mean the MOU that's been signed with the government in regards to the Lakeside redevelopment. They tell us soon, and I hope that it is so. I believe that the agreement will be something quite special. If you want to read the club's spiel, head here.

Michalokopoulos gaaaaaaawwn!

Peladrinos too. Fell or pushed? Don't know. New guy? If he exists, no one's told me. They just don't trust me anymore for some reason. Might have something to do with inadvertently starting 'the chaos'. Good luck to the boys in their future endeavours, unless they're against us of course. But that aside, Michalokopoulos played an important part in reversing the club's fortunes. After 7 round last year, we were relegation bound, looking doomed. By the end, there was something to latch on to. It carried forth into this year, with the Hellenic Cup win, some good signings, and a 10 match unbeaten streak. Somewhere along the line, as mentioned previously on this blog, it came unstuck. Form went out the window, strange substitutions were being made and the goalkeeping situation still hadn't sorted itself out. The coach can't score tap ins nor make regulation catches, but at some level the buck eventually stops with him.

Notes from the 2009 Grand Final

I was convinced by the opportunity to catch up with a few South fans - as well as my media pass granting me free entry - to turn up to this yesterday. Dandenong Thunder had streaked the league, four or so games clear by the end, but that counts for nothing when you have finals. Their opponents wee Altona Magic, defending champs, third grand final in four seasons - never having finished first on the table though in any of those years.

There was plenty to see and a few surprises as well. Altona Magic's main cash cow Melissa Fischer-Massa came out of hiding - she's been scarcely seen at a VPL venue since allegations of the abysmal financial state of her nursing homes came to light. The Albanian contingent seemed in reasonably strong presence, air horns and all. The Magic's fans had some presence, but mostly elderly and as usual a small group of young people for whom this is probably their first Magic game of the season.

As per usual, the PA system at Lakeside was a mess - the national anthem was half done before anyone realised it was on. Now, I'm not a huge fan of national flags and anthems, ut I don't believe there was any disrespect meant by people not singing or standing to attention - and besides, isn't that what's so great about a country like Australia? That we don't have to have guns at our heads making us pay our respects? It used to be like that I reckon, but perhaps my memory is faulty. The next surprise was the start of the 'Vou-vou-voulgari' and 'Tsi-tsi-tsigani' chants from the Albanians directed towards the Magic fans. A Heidelberg fan next to me attempted to note the irony of it all.

The game itself was lacking in any sort of cohesive quality. There was at best, an implied edge, that there was something bigger than three points on the line, but the game never really lifted in tempo or quality throughout its torturous 120 minutes plus several stoppages for injuries. The Thunder took the lead in the 2nd half, a saved shot ricocheting into the path of Thunder's captain who headed home. Altona leveled from the penalty spot, after a long range shot hit the arm of a defender. The young Magic fans bring out their ethnic flags, and the police and security move in, eventually. Reports soon spread that a guy had collapsed in the stands. The medics worked hard to revive him - and they do - but ultimately it is to no avail; he doesn't pull through. Three ambulances turned up in total. For some it put the game in perspective - it is just a game after all. But the game went on.

The penalty shootout saw the Thunder fans move behind the goal, and that's when the flare show started, and the FFV brought out the receipt book. If a flare lit is worth a $1k fine, then that's $7k at least that Dandenong will have to find from somewhere. At least a couple of flares were thrown back into the grassy area behind the scoreboard, which started a small grass fire. South board member George Koukoulas added Fireman Sam to his list of roles played at the club by putting out the fire with a fire extinguisher from inside the social club. The fire brigade turned up eventually, but they didn't have much to do. Bottles were also thrown from the grandstand onto the field.

After the game, the Thunder contingent left peacefully - leaving pretty much no one on hand to witness the Magic raising their fifth Victorian championship cup. A couple of us inspected the damage after the show, taking photos for the benefit of the FFV who'll have to pay up for it. Quite a few grandstand seats damaged in the sections the vocal Thunder fans were in, as well as some damage behind the goals where they'd moved for the penalty shootout. It's not the final game at Lakeside as we know it, but we're getting there.

Know Your Clubs - Olympic

Alright then, special treat for everyone today - everyone that is who didn't see this when I posted it on smfcboard last week. Courtesy of 4Flares, the following is a club profile on Melbourne's Olympic, one of South Melbourne Hellas's predeccessors.

A lot of names, some of which are apparently also related to Apollo Athletic, as stated in the article. From the little cross referencing I've been able to do so far I've been able to find that

• The late Nick Spartels was likely a boxer in the 1920s
• From another edition of Soccer News: Hector Hernandez, inside-left for Olympic, would be the only Mexican playing soccer in Australia. A Batchelor of Commerce, he is over here on a scholarship from the Mexican Government for the next two years, during which he hopes to obtain his Master of Commerce.
• We now know for certain that the Marmaras Cup was between the Olympics of Adelaide and Melbourne. The Melbourne and Sydney Hakoahs had a similar trophy they'd play for.
• (Sir) Eugene Gorman was a well known barrister in the first half 20th century Melbourne. The Greek Consul bit referred was an honorary title.
• In another 'Know Your Clubs' section, Park Rangers are mentioned as having been born off a split from the South Melbourne United Juniors in 1946. A Dockerty Cup winner, Park Rangers played in the Middle Park area for quite some years, before being taken over by a bunch of Scots (as mentioned to me by Hugh Murney) and moving to Kew. Later they became absorbed into what is now Moreland City. Does that make us related somehow? Up to you I guess.

Gold Medal Night Results for South

Laura Spiranovic finished runner up to the eventual winner in the Women's Premier League. Ross Thomson of Hume won the men's award with 25 votes. The best placed South players was... Fernando De Moraes, If I had a malfunctioning air-conditioner and a hat, we would be able to recreate the classic skit form the Fallout Boy episode of The Simpsons.

The other smfcboard

This is how much I'm procrastinating. Got a ton of stuff to do, and yet why do that when you can waste a few seconds by going into the profile section of the forum and changing the forum theme to subSilver from Cobalt 2.0. There's also another one called JustFooty, a horrible and hard to look at green(!) and white concoction.

South women lose 4-2 in prelim against Bergers

3-0 down after 15 minutes. Game as good as done right there. Did not look at all likely up front in the first half, and everyone else seemed asleep. Second half had a chance to pull it back to 3-1, but instead went 4-0 down. Two consolation goals were the final chapter in an otherwise very good season after so many years of struggle.

The collision of a wish with an unyielding reality

There are certain times when it is useful to return to the musings of people who have been through this before and had a decent think about it. Alain De Botton's look at Seneca is quite useful, pop-philosophy though it might be.

Seneca was a philosopher of the Roman Empire. He noticed that at the heart of every frustration lies a basic structure: the collision of a wish with an unyielding reality. We attain wisdom by learning not to aggravate the world’s obstinacy through spasms of rage, self-pity, anxiety, bitterness, self-righteousness and paranoia.

What makes us angry are dangerously optimistic notions about what the world and other people are like. How badly we react to frustration is critically determined by what we think of as normal. We will cease to be so angry once we cease to be so hopeful.

Reality comprises two cruelly confusing characteristics. We are invited to assume that tomorrow will be much like today. Yet there is a possibility that we will meet an appalling event after which nothing will ever be the same again.

When one suffers disaster, one is unable to fit the event into a scheme of justice. One alternates between a feeling that one may after all have been bad, and the feeling that one has fallen victim to a failure in the administration of justice. The belief that the world is fundamentally just is implied in the very complaint that there has been an injustice. It is based on a picture of a moral universe where external circumstances reflected internal qualities.

Frustration, anger, shock, and the sense of injustice are caused by an incorrect paradigm of the world. Wisdom lies in correct discerning where we are free to mould reality according to our wishes, and where must accept the unalterable with tranquility. Reason allows us to determine when our wishes are in irrevocable conflict with reality, and then bids us to submit ourselves willingly, rather than angrily or bitterly, to necessities. We may be powerless to alter certain events, but we remain free to choose our attitude towards them. It is in our spontaneous acceptance of necessity that we find our distinctive freedom. Seneca recommended this formula:

[The wise] will start each day with the thought…

Fortune gives us nothing which we can really own. Nothing, whether public or private, is stable; the destinies of men, no less than those of cities are in a whirl. Whatever structure has been reared by a long sequence of years, at the cost of great toil and through the great kindness of the gods, is scattered and dispersed in a single day.

No, he who has said “a day” has granted too long a postponement to swift isfortune; an hour, an instant of time, suffices for the overthrow of empires. How often have cities in Asia, how often in Achaia, been laid low by a single shock of earthquake? How many towns in Syria, how many in Macedonia, have been swallowed up? How often has this kind of devastation laid Cyprus in ruins?

We live in the middle of things which have been destined to die. Mortal have you been born, to mortals have you given birth. Reckon on everything, expect everything.

Details for women's preliminary final

Just for the record, I ain't on the women's team mailing list, nor do I get a retainer from the government to spruik its Lakeside redevelopment plans, I've never been paid for any of my three or so articles on Neos Kosmos English Weekly and no one really tells me anything anymore that I'm allowed to tell you until everyone else can know it at the same time as well. I can't even be suitably cryptic without getting in trouble with the chocolate cake eaters.

But now over to Niki Cook from the women's team ruling cabal, Gang of Four etc. One of my lecturers, tutors, supervisors, Svengalis this semester, John Weldon (who knew at least one of Guy Garvey's sisters back in Bury, zomg) made a reference to the Gang Of Four to people in my performance writing class who were all likely between the ages of 18-20, and unfamiliar with either the band or the Chinese Communist Party political faction said band were named after. Don't worry, I had a word to him about it.


Hello all

After a game of heart-stopping excitement last Saturday, our Senior team defeated Sandringham 3-2 in extra time, and has progressed to the WPL Preliminary Final. Victory in this game would put the team in the Grand Final, which is a fantastic achievement.

The Preliminary Final takes place on Sunday morning (6th September), and it will be held at Bob Jane Stadium. Kick off is 11am.

Once again, we would love your support, it was amazing last week to hear the crowd cheering us on, it really made a difference.

Entry to the game is free.

The event flyer is attached.

Hope to see you there,

Niki

Fernando youtube video stats courtesy of Gains

Our buddy Gains posted the following data on smfcboard, noting perhaps indirectly at the irony of 500 people being at the game while nearly 275,000 hits have been registered for it online. This is all for the month of August - remembering that the clip wasn't even uploaded until the 15th August.

#1 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#6 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Australia
#6 - Top Favorited (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#14 - Top Rated (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#21 - Most Discussed (This Month) - Sports - Australia
#43 - Most Viewed (This Month) - Sports
#73 - Top Favorited (This Month) - Australia
#78 - Most Responded (This Month) - Sports - Australia

South girls through to preliminary final

Very exciting match, both teams really wanted to win it, a couple of great crunching slide tackles from our girls at crucial moments, perfectly timed were my highlights. Really end to end stuff for much of the game. First half we cleared one off the line, and then scored soon after from a corner, goal at back post. Sandy equalised soon afterwards in much the same fashion from a free kick on edge of box. We got a penalty late in firts half and went into the break 2-1 up.

Momentum swung this way and that in the 2nd half, and deep into injury time Sandy put away a goal mouth scramble. About 10 minutes into second half injury time, substitute Jade Barnden got the ball on the counter, with a defender on her inside and the keeper to beat, timed her run/shot just well enough to sneak it in at the far post. A couple of scary moments right at the death as the conditions worsened considerably - that is, it started absolutely bucketing down, and the South keeper dropped one in the six yard box, but we managed to clear it and that was pretty much it.

Sandy will feel hard done by, as they had more than their fair share of the play and chances, but South winning the game was hardly a travesty either. Curiously South's first two goals were greeted by Adelaide Crows style clapping, and Sandy's goals by loud cheers, but the winning goal was a loud roar from the home supporters.

Delivering a service of sorts

How could I forget about this? We love constructive criticism on South of the Border, and we love a good, honest debate as well. Sometimes these things get a little heated. Last year, the closer we got to having to vote on the Lakeside redevelopment deal, the more angst was thrown about amongst the supporter base, and smfcboard was no exception. The lack of detail given out by the board was a major factor in this - and their reasoning of confidentiality, and the importance of only social club members, was not to the satisfaction. This is an example of one such exchange, between myself and a forumite named Puskas (whom I have never met personally, but am assured by someone who knows him that he's a good guy, and I believe that to be true). The reason I put it up is because of the last line, as you'll see. Did he end up following through with his threat of voting against the proposed deal? I don't know. The members were pretty much unanimous in giving their assent, and in such cases, for better or worse we see the function of a member run club being played out. 

Puskas: But then again the majority of the members here bent over willingly and copped it up the arse by Lowy and his FFA mafia.

Me: And please us how the majority of members here took it up the arse but you somehow stuck it to the man? What did you do?

Puskas: The board and members could've made a lot more noise when we lost our status within the football hierarchy of this country. The board should've bombarded the media. The board should've been in everyone's face. Instead it was just a yes man to Lowy. Lets not forget Adelaide, Perth and Brisbane were with us in the NSL and now have A-League status. This club has lost all chance of ever being in the elite competition. Unless the A-League collapses we are doomed to play VPL forever or until we get relegated. Tell Eddie and his Athletics Victoria board to go fuck themselves and I will be voting for that at the AGM. Why don't you stick that in your blog faggot.

South women in elimination final tomorrow

Message from the women's team that I have informally been asked to pass on.


As relayed in a previous email, our WPL seniors have qualified for the finals. They finished third on the ladder, which gives us a home final for this must win game. It is an Elimination Final against Sandringham, the fourth placed side, so there are no second chances.

The game will take place at 3pm this Saturday (29th August) at Bob Jane Stadium.

We would love to see as many of you as possible at the ground to give the club your support in this historic game. Given that it is our home game, let's create a hostile atmosphere to strike fear into the Sandringham hearts!

Come down, bring family and friends, wear your club colours, and let's get the team even further into the finals!

Lakeside Redevelopment News - First Draft Released

Last night various State Government departments hosted a public information session at Parks Victoria headquarters in Albert Park. This was to provide the public with its first proper chance to review the first draft plans of the stadium reconstruction as well as the effects of the entire project on the local open space footprint.

There were people from the state's sport and recreation department, major projects and Parks Victoria. The meeting, which went for two hours, was sparsely attended. All up two South supporters turned up - myself included - one representative from the local tennis club, and at best half a dozen locals, mostly elderly, of various levels of crankiness.

There were several new images of the actual plans, rather than just the artists impression stuff we've been seeing so far. Some of these can be seen on this page. What they show is the plans not just for the stadium itself but for the synthetic pitches and pavilion down Middle Park way. Be aware that as this is a first draft and mostly for public consultancy purposes, the actual finished product may well differ.

There was a decent amount of information, and an apparent willingness to inform the public about what was going on. It will be on again this Saturday from 2-4 at Parks Victoria HQ, which is not too far from BJS. It's certainly worth the effort, and you can pop over to watch the South women play their elimination final which starts at 3. For those who can't make it, the state government has provided some of the information online, as well as an online form to fill out with feedback. Those who submit feedback will get a copy of the independent report when it is complete.

I can't stress enough the importance of getting as much reasonable South Melbourne Hellas supporter feedback to these people. Not that I believe that local residents unhappy with the redevelopment and restructure of their local space will get their way; but rather to start building a culture of South supporters becoming active players in their own club's future. Having spent the better part of two hours there though, I'm happy to provide a general outline of the questions I asked and the answers they provided. Why the club has not been proactive in putting this info up on our website I do not know.

Firstly in regards to the new pitches we've been hearing about down Middle Park way. Four of these will be grouped together, and will be synthetic. Two of these will be grass pitches. The latter will be shared with touch rugby which currently also makes use of the planned area. The site of the new pavilion will be the derelict RSL building, which will be knocked down.

Somewhat closer to home. Parking space will not be increased, but rather the space there will re-designed or redistributed to be more efficient, or words to that effect. There will be some sort of walking track around the venue as well, and more trees, the thinking behind that being an increase of open or green space.

The 1926 Stand will be refurbished with all the facilities that the Victorian Institute of Sport will need. There will likely be some decorative/architectural work to enhance its heritage aspects, but it will not be refitted in order to host stadium seating. The rationale for that was that the line of sight was not suitable for either soccer or athletics. The Sydney Swans will have no place in there. Neither will South have any access to the facilities inside.

Now to the stadium itself. Apart from the track, and the new Northern Stand, there will be a new Athletics Victoria building built adjacent to our social club, in the space currently accessed via the Jimmy Armstrong Gate. There will also seemingly be refurbishment of the changeroom areas underneath our stand as part of this work.

Our social clubs will remain ours, and under the same or similar terms apparently as exist now. This means that any prospective plans for sub-leasing out the social club space to outside groups such as commercial operations would have to go through the same same process. The government agency will take over from us the upper level where the reception centre currently is.

The stadium itself, apart from the running track and new stand, will also have all the other necessary athletic improvements added, such long jump pits etc. It will also receive new lighting and a new broadcast area. And there will also be a new scoreboard with video playback ability. The areas that appear in green on the turn will likely be concrete terracing, and not grass as may be implied from the diagrams. The estimated capacity will be about 8-9k, with about 5k of that seating - though that is a rough estimate at this stage.

With regards to tenancy, usage rights and leases. Lakeside will come under a new trust, while the new Middle Park pitches will remain under the auspices of Parks Victoria. No details about new lease terms were revealed, as these are believed to be still under negotiation and would be confidential anyway. There will be three, what the government calls, 'priority tenants'. These will be South, Athletics Victoria and the VIS. Usage rights will depend on the time of year. The department's representatives said they estimated about 70 athletics carnivals of various types would be held there every year. We would still be able to train on Lakeside's surface. There is an emphasis on opening the space back up to the public, allowing local groups to hire out the venue. The naming rights issue is also undecided. The new trust will take over the stadium costs and maintenance that do not fall under the control of the individual priority tenants.

While all this dependent on planning and administrative processes, the work on the Middle Park aspect could begin by the end of the year. The work on Lakeside itself will most likely begin after next year's Grand Prix, and take up 18 months, with the new track and pitch being done within 8-9 months. The tender for the stadium work has not released yet. On paper it all looks pretty good. The obvious plan form a South point of view is to create a financially sustainable club model, while returning it's local involvement and presence to a pre-BJS era, when we had more fields and local participants. I'm optimistic, but of course caution must be exercised.

South of the Border awards 2009

Collect and prepare ingredients from February-August. Simmer over low heat for a couple of days. Post and leave to cool on blog windowsill and be ignored by everyone.

Player of the year: Sebastian Petrovic. Even George Katsakis was impressed with his performances this year.

Under 21 player of the year: The Cliff Hussey Memorial Trophy goes to James Spanos. Rare for a player to go through an entire season and not make a single mistake, but he did it.

Goal of the year: Goran Zoric's fourth goal against Preston at BT Connor. Flick, volley, from outside the box, top corner, 7-1, good night nurse.

Best performance over a whole match: Bergers away. Too bad we couldn't score a goal to go with it.

Best period of play during the season: Probably the first 20 minutes of the 2nd half against the Knights at Lakeside. We kinda looked like we could do anything then.

Best away game: Richmond. Good company (except for Psile, who was in hiding from Victorious), good food, good win, and the Pies got up by a point as well.

Best call on the terraces: The old bloke who'd fainted/collapsed at the home game against Hume. When the ambulance arrived and he'd seemingly partially recovered he apparently asked them if he could stay to watch the second half. I was saddened to hear that this person, apparently a member for over 40 years, passed away a few weeks ago. My condolence to his family and friends. I hope I still have the same love for this club in 40 years time.

Chant of the year: Come On Hellas! Forza! Hellas!. Yes it's a chant from 2008, but one which was only chanted with any enthusiasm once the bloke who created it fucked off to Poland.