Thursday, 10 April 2014

Kiss of Death, Round 4, 2014

Pascoe Vale vs Northcote City – Friday 11th April @ 8.30pm @ Hosken Reserve
Pascoe Vale had a good 1-1 draw at Bentleigh last week, while Northcote succumbed to a very good Ballarat side 1-3 as predicted. As much as my heart is saying Pascoe Vale, my brain and algorithms are saying Northcote. This will be Northcote's first win of the season. Pascoe Vale 1 – Northcote City 2.

Oakleigh Cannons vs Green Gully – Friday 11th April @ 8.30pm @ Jack Edwards
Oakleigh drew 2-2 at Port last week, while Gully put in a laughable performance in a 3-5 loss to South Melbourne. They had Gonzalez (GK) and some other douche sent off. I think their youth keeper did well when required. Oakleigh on the other hand have yet to show me anything on or off the park. No food, no write up. Simple. Oakleigh Cannons 2 – Green Gully 0.

Goulburn Valley Suns vs Port Melbourne Sharks – Saturday 12th April @ 6.30pm @ McEwen Reserve
This is a hard one to pick. But I don’t pick matches will-nilly. A lot of thought goes into them. The Suns got hammered last week by the Bergers. See, that right there just doesn’t make sense. How can a team as poor as the Bergers hammer a team like the Suns who are poor anyway. Port will be triumphant and drop into SPC on the way back. Goulburn Valley Suns 1 – Port Melbourne Sharks 7.

Hume City vs South Melbourne – Sunday 13th April @ 3pm @ Broadmeadows Valley
Finally get to suss out this new grandstand down at Broadmeadows Valley Park. A few people reckon it’s pretty good. I’ll see for myself I suppose. South is coming off a rampant 3-5 win at Gully. We were 0-4 up very very quickly last week, and it should’ve been at least six by half time, no exaggeration there. What happened in the second half was a wee bit disappointing. To cop two goals in the first five minutes was pretty woeful. People were losing their shit at that hunk of man meat Saldaris, but on closer inspection, I don’t fault him with any of the goals. Gully were just cunts. The tackles were thick, and the red cards were warranted. The rest is history. The team of the century was just too good. They will also be too good against Hume. Hume City 0 – South Melbourne 3.

Werribee City vs Bentleigh Greens – Sunday 13th April @ 3pm @ Galvin Park
Werribee robbed the Knights last week. Dodgiest penalty I've ever seen. Well actually, no, Olympiakos is awarded the worst non-penalties known to man. Bentleigh struggled against Pascoe Vale but will be too good against the Bees. I really can’t see Werribee beating the Greens. The scouts will once again be at a Bentleigh game, and word on the grapevine is they like what they see. Werribee City 1 – Bentleigh Greens 3.

Melbourne Knights vs Dandenong Thunder – Sunday 13th April @ 3pm @Knights Stadium
What a shit penalty to cop, ey? Maybe next time you can put away your chances! The Knights will not let that happen again. A source close to the club is confident the Knights will bounce back after last week's speedhump. Dandy on the other hand are looking OK I suppose. Haven't really seen them other than on youtube. Note to DandyTV guys. Maybe do a voice over before you publish. The language is bloody ridiculous. Melbourne Knights 2 – Dandy Thunder 0.

Heidelberg United vs Ballarat Red Devils – Sunday 13th April @ 6pm @ Olympic Village
The two big winners from last week. Note to the Bergers. Ballarat will not be a pushover. Me has a feeling they will beat yous. Heidelberg United 1 – Ballarat Red Devils 2. *92nd minute controversial penalty to the Devils. Bergers to lose their shit.

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