Kiss of Death, round 9, 2014

Port Melbourne Sharks vs Hume City - Friday 16 May @ 8:30PM @ SS Anderson Reserve
Port Melbourne had the tougher of the 2 tasks last weekend disposing easily of the Ballarat Red Devils, while Hume had a 4-1 win at home to Goulburn Valley. Will be an interesting match with Hume only having conceded nine goals. Port on the other hand have scored and conceded 15. I think Hume will be too good for Port, with them just nudging over the line.  Port Melbourne Sharks 1 – Hume City 2.

Ballarat Red Devils vs Green Gully - Saturday 17 May 14 @ 3:00PM @ Morshead Park
Ballarat lost at home to Port Melbourne 0-4, while Gully once again got thumped 4-0 away to the Bergers. Ballarat has somewhat impressed me, but their discipline is their let down. Red cards in the last few matches have cost them points. Gully is having the shittest start in their history, and will most likely start rebuilding as of this weekend. Ballarat will finally get their first win at home and third overall for the season. Ballarat Red Devils 3 – Green Gully 1.

Goulburn Valley Suns vs Bentleigh Greens - Saturday 17 May 14 @ 6:30PM @ Jack McEwen Reserve
Goulburn Valley has a new coach as of last weekend. Peter Zois is the man at the helm and he has some work to do with the Suns. Bentleigh lost 2-1 at South last week and weren’t too bad for the first 45 minutes. In the second half they fell to shit. They looked like they were more worried about losing than winning. Johnny A left his subs too late, and if he had made them earlier, the scoreline might have been different. They will however be too good for the rabble that are the Goulburn Valley Suns. Goulburn Valley Suns 0 – Bentleigh Greens 3.

Dandenong Thunder vs Werribee City - Saturday 17 May 14 @ 7:00PM @ George Andrews Reserve
Dandenong had a good 1-3 win at Northcote, while Werribee drew 1-1 with Pascoe Vale, missing a penalty in the 92nd minute. Dandenong is hot and cold. They can't make up their mind if they’re winning or losing. Werribee is yet to find its feet. For their information, you wont find Leigh Minopoulos either, he’s at South. No Leigh Minopoulos, no Werribee City. Dandenong Thunder 3 – Werribee City 0.

Oakleigh Cannons vs Northcote City - Sunday 18 May 14 @ 3:15PM @ Jack Edwards Reserve
Oakleigh had a 3-1 win over the Knights, while Northcote City struggled 1-3 against Dandy. I witnessed the last 20 minutes or so of last week's Oaks vs Knights match and wasn’t too impressed with Oakleigh at 2-1 to be honest. I don’t see what the big deal is. They have more weaknesses than strengths. The Knights were severely depleted, so I’d take that win with a grain of salt. Northcote. HAHA. Suck it. Keep Rixon and all the others at John Cain. Showponies. Oakleigh Cannons 3 – Northcote City 0.

South Melbourne vs Pascoe Vale - Sunday 18 May 14 @ 5:00PM @ Lakeside Stadium
South beat Bentleigh 2-1 and Pascoe Vale left Werribee 1-1. The first half last week wasn’t too flash for South. As mentioned further up, Bentleigh looked like a team who were more worried about losing, rather than winning. Holding possession, stupid passes, and time wasting were all part of Bentleigh's pathetic attempt to beat the Team of the Century. If Johnny A made those subs earlier, they might’ve had a sniff. The second half South dominated, and were silly to concede that goal at the end. The ref, well what a dick. Six minutes of injury time for what exactly? Douche. Pascoe Vale were lucky at Werribee last week. In the 92nd minute Werribee missed a penalty and let Pascoe get away with one pint. But ah well. South Melbourne 3 – Pascoe Vale 0.

Heidelberg United vs Melbourne Knights - Sunday 18 May 14 @ 6:00PM @ Olympic Village
Heidelberg had their way 4-0 with Gully, while the Knights were unlucky I felt losing 3-1 at Oakleigh. The Knights are pretty much fucked at the moment. Injuries, injuries and more injuries. The Bergers find themselves in unfamiliar territory sitting third on the ladder. Have they been playing well? Not really, but well enough to collect points, which is all that matters this year. Get the points, finish first, and the title is yours. Heidelberg United 3 – Melbourne Knights 0.

Rumours and Innuendo
Smfcboard.com – Moron Alert.
The shit people write on there is pathetic. I was tipped off by a user that apparently, Leigh Minopoulos is unhappy and is looking to leave the club in June for first team football. What a crock. I’ve made a few phone calls overnight, Melbourne time. Leigh Minopoulos is NOT unhappy at South, Leigh Minopoulos is NOT leaving South, Leigh Minopoulos understands HIS role at South, South is one big happy family with 8 from 8. I got a few screenshots provided as well. Apparently some dick has gone and put that Leigh Minopoulos is in talks with Altona East (your team Paul), and that they were beaten to his signature by Melbourne Tornado (does this team even exist). Funny thing is, a few people fell for it!

Donuts
A cheerio goes out to Pascoe Vale president Lou Tona (@LouTona) who started following me on twitter @KODFootball. We had a good chat about the pizza and food delicacies down at Hosken Reserve. Apparently, the donuts down at Hosken Reserve are “quality”. Apparently, “introduce yourself next time and I will buy you some doughnuts”, “I will organise with latte”. Lou also went on to offer myself and Paul Mavroudis free entry into the match at Hosken when South plays there.

This my friends, is a president! A man who not only loves his team, but appreciates the people who go out of their way to write about football in this state. Unlike those mutts down at FFV who don’t even issue media passes! Lou Tona, I take my hat off to you. You are a gentleman, a true lover of the sport. Unfortunately, South will beat you guys this Sunday at Lakeside.