South of the Border awards 2019

No one deserved anything for this season, yet here we are.

Player of the year: Jake Marshall. Had to give it to someone, and since barely anyone either played all or most games, or even played consistently well in most games, I'm giving it to the bloke who improved the most from last season.

Under 21 player of the year: The Cliff Hussey Memorial Trophy goes to Ben Djiba. An actual South youth player who won himself a starting position and didn't look out of place in doing so.

Goal of the year: Luke Adams' chest control and volley against Port all the way back in round 3. There were some flukey goals, a couple of nice goals by Gerrie Sylaidos, even some nice team goals, but since we barely had a striker all season, Adams' finish was the closest we'd get. And it was a nice goal.

Best performance: Heidelberg away. We looked like the real deal for half an hour.

Best away game: Also Heidelberg away. Much comedy ensued.

Call of the year: Hume goalkeeper Michael Weier's genuine concern for our emotional welfare when he noticed that we weren't abusing him.

Chant of the year: the cantor at Heidelberg away during the bride and groom's photo. Sorry to everyone else who tried to come up with chants to the tune of 'Guantanamera' or 'Go West', or whatever that very bad Josh Dorron chant out at Dandenong was.

Best pre-match/after match dinner location: Afghan Star in Sunshine.

Friends we lost along the way: A South umbrella I lost at a Catholic community hall.

Barely related to anything stupidity highlight of the year: The People's Champ actually getting the sack from a club. Who knew it could be that easy?