I can't see through metal, Kent! St Albans 0 South Melbourne 1

I've been burnt by this increasingly frequent phenomenon before, but never quite like this. 

With all home duties sorted, I decided to head to Churchill Reserve early, get one of those sweet parking spots out the front, and catch a bit of the reserves match. Sure enough I got my nice parking spot right behind the "no standing" sign, but something was off... where were the gate attendants? Oh well, I walked through the unmanned gate, saw no action on the main pitch, and just assumed the ressies were playing on the second field.

I walked over to the second field, saw no familiar faces of the kind who also like to get to games early to watch a bit of the curtain raiser. Certainly there was a game on, and one team was identifiable as St Albans, but the other team was clearly not South Melbourne, but was instead one of the four (at least) Italian black and white horsey teams. And the kids looked just a touch too young to be under 21s. Well, that sucked. Still, what was one to do, drive off home and come back later? Better to stick around and watch what one social media interlocutor opined were the future of the state leagues; he didn't specify which state league exactly.

And I did get to see some entertaining stuff. Like a contested drop-ball! That was a pretty sweet moment, two young players attacking the ball firmly, but fairly. Even more entertaining was the visiting team (maybe) beating the offside trap, sending their man through on goal, only for him to trip over the ball, and scuff any attempt at a shot... but then also get fouled from behind in the box, earning his side a penalty, and the home team a red card. Up stepped a young man for the penalty, skying the ball over the crossbar like he was going for a two-point rugby conversion.

But then people I knew started trickling in eventually, and I'm not the biggest fan of junior football anyway, so off to the social club, and the finally the main game.

Let's be honest: we were never going to lose this game. I would even go as far to say that we were always going to win it. This is the exact time of year where St Albans start falling apart. Dinamo initially manages to surpass everyone's low expectations of them, their main ground looks good, the sun shines, and then... splat. No matter how well they start a Victorian top-flight season, the field soon turns to crap, and a good South or a rickety South turns up, and it doesn't seem to matter; this is the point where it all goes turns to dust for St Albans.

Apparently our lineup was a confusing mess. I didn't really care to check or pay too much attention to it. The first half was not good, but at least it went by quickly. The second half was better, and I just wish that we had scored at least one more goal, at least to make it a more sure thing. Dinamo flashed a few moments across the face of goal late, but they were never going to score, they were not going to get a single point out of this match. 

Really, all this messing about trying to find alternative accommodation during the grand prix and Women's World Cup, when we should just play at Churchill Reserve full time. The worse the ground is, the better we are on it. We should become co-tenants and dig up the main field a bit more. Max Mikkola did some nice things (throwing the ball straight at Dinamo's giant keeper not being one of them though), but what wins you games at this ground is pressing up against defenders with inadequate ball control. 

And this ground is so small, that even our penchant for sitting back still has us right up against the opposition in their own half. Even Marcus Schroen, not known for being a tackling machine midfielder, was able to dispossess an opponent, and begin the sequence of play for what was eventually the winning goal.

Also, it helps (sorta) if the opposition decides to handicap itself by getting what was apparently a pretty stupid red card during the first half for the fourth week in a row, much to the chagrin of overseas gamblers on social media. I say apparently for this week's incident, because where I was positioned, there was these giant metal benches in the way, and scaffolding, and light towers, and more benches, so I didn't see it live. I saw it on the video later, and my goodness, what a shit tackle and I don't know how the player can argue against it.

As for any more illuminating comments, the view from the outer side is so rubbish, and I somehow ended up in a discussion about fans invading the field for AFL players kicking their hundredth, and how old the crowd was for Megadeth at Knotfest, and all sorts of other malarkey, that I don't have much to offer. I'm just glad that Max's goal was at our end of the field right in front of us, not obscured by the detritus of generational piecemeal stadium construction.

Next game
Away at Oakleigh. That's this Saturday, if you're planning to go. No one's forcing you to attend. Rather conveniently, it's also on Saturday if you want to watch the game on NPL TV. 

New segment - is there a curtain raiser this week?
Yes. The under 21s play at 5:00pm

On the streams
I'm weak, I'm spineless, I'm a man of temptation... but what tempts me?
For whatever reason, I didn't end up watching anything last weekend. I've substituted having the footy on in the background instead of NPL TV, and it's good. But then midweek, and I'm reading people discussing some Australia Cup game with two teams I wouldn't cross the street to watch unless I was guaranteed they would lose, and even then... but also discussion about certain young Greeks - thankfully not affiliated with us, because which young Greek is even associated with us these days that isn't one of our ressies? - trying to stir up shenanigans, and my curiosity gets the better of me, albeit I leave it as late as I can before tuning in, about 15 minutes to go. And all I see, with the volume set to low, is a Chris Taylor side doing what it does best, grinding out a result when it has a lead. All of a bit of an anti-climax, which is good, right? 

Final thought
Behold the chilling re-enactment of an unnamed Sydney club trying to get its NSD application in on the last day.

Rubbish - South Melbourne 0 Heidelberg United 2

Nothing much more to say other then that the performance in the first half was absolute rubbish. Against probably the most mediocre Heidelberg team in a decade, we looked beyond inept. Without Ajak Riak, all we could muster was a series on pointless passing on our the line of our own six yard box, before booting it long up the field to Alun Webb or Max Mikkola. There was no midfield. We've seen this before at the worst times under Esteban Quintas; a giant "central midfield is lava" situation which all but begs the opposition to take up that space and press us to 2013 tanking Southern Stars levels. And who better to do that than Heidelberg under George Katsakis, who anachronistically still play with two up front?

The second half was better, in that at least we stated knocking the ball around, but the crossing and finishing were so poor, that it was far more likely that Heidelberg would score again before we would, and that's what happened. We had nearly 20 corners, two thirds of them in the second half, but without our two best corner takers, everything that came just floated harmlessly into the box. And the short corners? They were so numerous and so poor, that the usual suspects who are desperate for a short corner goal out of spite against me, didn't even bother getting excited about them.

The two best chances we had were the header that was cleared off the line (these things happen), and Alun Webb scuffing his one on one chance went put through clear on goal. Someone quipped on the forum hat he must've been in shock that a ball played was actually played at his feet, and that just might be the call of the year so far. Still, there were signs there abut how the team should play, which is lots of shorter passes, and always forward to the next person at the expense of going sideways. NPL defenses hate going backwards, they are almost uniformly terrible at it, so  why wouldn't that be the way to attack them, especially if you have ball playing mids at your disposal?

What's extra funny (apart from Esteban resorting to his old trick of a million halftime subs, like he was playing FIFA) is that other teams have started doing the long throw shtick as well. I mean, putting aside the fact that it worked at all, let alone to the extent that it did, surely it shouldn't be plan A, right? Anyway, all I can hope for is that last week was a blip, and not some sort of justified comeuppance for playing backfoot football and somehow coming out with maximum points most weeks.

Of more concern - and it's still early days, so let's not too get too emotionally wrought - is that it's hard to see just yet which of the new players has made us better. Sulemani looks a shadow of the attacking demon he was at Thunder. Painter-Andrews is in and out. Danny Kim is hardly there, and even if he started, would he fit our style? And while Riak has done good things, it's more of a sideways step so far than a forward, given that we still end up relying on guy up front, and the previous guy bagged twenty goals.

Next game
The annual grand prix enforced trek around the suburbs begins this Sunday, as we are away at St Albans.

Congratulations to Ajak Riak (also, we are doomed)
On one really obvious level, it's clearly fantastic for Ajak Riak to have made his international debut for South Sudan, playing most of the match in a 2-1 win against Republic of the Congo in African Cup of Nations qualifying. In what's a rare occurrence these days, Riak is probably the first South player since Luke Adams (who played for the All Whites in 2016) to play national team football while in the service of our club. 

But prestige aside, it means one of our more valuable players is possibly going to be missing at several key points of the season. South Sudan play against Republic of the Congo again on Monday, and then has two more qualifying matches during international fixture breaks in June and September. I suppose the only thing we can say is that we're not the only NPL Victoria team with this problem - two of Riak's South Sudan teammates are NPL Victoria players at other clubs.

Fixture news
First, our upcoming league fixture away against Oakleigh has been moved from the Friday to the Saturday, and the kickoff time from 8:30 to 7:30 PM. Good news for everyone who wants to go to the real Greek derby on March 31st, that of course being Collingwood vs Richmond at the MCG.

Second, our Australia Cup match against Kingston City has been locked in for April 11th, a Tuesday, at Lakeside. Here's hoping the result gets sorted in regular time, because with kickoff scheduled for 8:15 PM, we might not get home until morning.

Finally, the round 9 league game against Bentleigh, originally scheduled for April 14th - which is Orthodox Good Friday - has been moved to the afternoon of April 15th. Quite how the original date made it past those running the show has got me stuffed. 

AGM news
I have been told that the financial reports are done, and that we'll be having an AGM as soon as possible once we get access to Lakeside again after the grand prix.

Women
Yes, there were some schedule conflicts on the South of the Border home front, but also something went awry with my attempts to stream the senior women's first game of the season. I'm going to say it was probably 83% my fault, and the remainder someone else's. What I did see wasn't particularly edifying, in that it was a lot a rushed long balls up front, with occasional inadequate finishing. Hopefully it was just rust.

On the streams
South lost, the footy's back, and the Osaka sumo basho is on the internet thanks to dodgy streamers, so who's watching other teams?

Final thought
As South fans, we have the right to expect to be entertained by our team. One could go further; that except in exceptional circumstances, the team should be obligated to attempt to entertain us. Even accounting for the effects of nostalgia and being in this league, this is one of the things which made our club great: it was predominantly a ball playing club, with its best teams being not just effective, but life affirming. 

Flag - Dandenong Thunder 0 South Melbourne 1

I alternate between despising how this team plays and yet still manages to grind out wins, and admiring with significant reservation how this team grinds out wins even when it doesn't play particularly well. Last Saturday was more of the latter. First half OK, second half, or at least the first thirty minutes of it, ugly. We're going to run into a team that can shoot at some point this season, and it's not going to be pretty. Until that point though, we'll make do with being the luckiest team in the world, even if you subscribe to the idea that you make at least some of your own luck.

Sight lines at Dandy are pretty ordinary unless you're in the stand, and even there are poles a plenty to get in the way; when it's not being the National Penalties League this is the National Poles in the way League. First half regular spot and regular view behind the freeway end goal. Real close up view of no one tracking Pat Langlois into the box again, and thus he has three goals in four games. Much further away from the action, and generally stymied for a second match in a row, Ajak Riak plays his part in the goal, too, something really only verifiable from our angle by watching it on the replay later.

A shortish week, and South loses players to the attrition of the early season. Lirim Elmazi off injured early, hopefully precautionary. Max Mikkola off later, hoping for the same. Elmazi, not the most skilled with the ball, is still pretty good without it, and without him, we begin losing shape. Mikkola, not the best without the ball, but almost certainly our best with it, and without him composure and implied attacking threat vanish.

But it was hard to tell how bad it really was in the second half, because at the social club end of the ground there's now this huge new fence which makes viewing the game even harder than it used to be. So much has to be left to the imagination; and since I tend to imagine the worst, everything tends to look worse. And in the end, how much worse can you get than top of the league? The only way from here is down, after all.

Next game
Friday night at home against an increasingly shambles Heidelberg. The parking situation should be fun. 

Turns out the Football Victoria constitution guarantees some
 staff a pig every month, and two comely lasses of virtue true.

The NCIP is dead. Long live the NCIP.
Wild scenes behind the freeway end goal during the first half on Saturday, with security, under instruction from a mysterious "commissioner", trying to get us to put away a Greek flag. This at a ground with an Albanian flag painted on the grandstand, while blasting out Albanian tunes over the PA system, and whose home team had massive double-headed eagles on the back of their jerseys. All of which I have an issue with on the grounds of a lack of tasteful subtlety, but not much else really.

Now those of you who attend South games will probably have seen our for now anonymous friend (who is not Greek) and his flag at some point, (those of you who don't attend may have seen it on broadcasts or in photo montages) and you may have even seen his England and Wales flags at home matches. It's something he does of his own volition. No one's told him to do it. 

Anyway, our friend had been waving it rather than hanging it on the fence, but upon the security guy's request tucked it away for a bit. The conversation between I suppose you'd call it Clarendon Corner and the security guy ended with the secco being told to go back to the "commissioner" to get them to come down personally so we could have a polite chat about it. Security guy goes off, and comes back later saying the "commissioner" says it's in his book of regulations that the flag is banned, unless it has the club logo on it or some such to distinguish it from merely being a national flag. We then told the security guy again to get the bloke to come down and show us the actual passage/clause, because the National Club Identity Policy as it was has been dead for four years, and we can google the articles to prove it. And yes of course I googled it. 

Second half and we've moved to the other end of the ground, and the security guy walks past the social club goal on his rounds. He says the "commissioner" can't find the rule. Well duh. I mean the secco wasn't being a knob about it, but don't these people read the news? Aren't they meant to be up to date with what they're supposed to be policing? More to the point, we never found out who this "commissioner" was, a question which perplexed me then and still does, since designated match commissioners haven't been a thing at Victorian grounds for what seems like well over a decade. 

Women's season begins
Our senior women begin their season at home against Heidelberg on Saturday. From a distance (ie, glancing at the club's social media), it looks like the squad is swinging back to recruiting outside of its own junior ranks. 2023 also sees the competition expand from eight teams to eleven, with Preston, Boroondara Eagles, and Southern United all finding their way back into the women's top flight after varying number of years away. That'll add a bit of variety at least by, if nothing else, evening out the ratio of teams with "United" in their name just a bit.

Two, then four, and also 25 million more obstacles to our return to top-flight glory
Oh, the humanity. The A-League is going to add two new teams to its pyramid scheme outside the actual pyramid system, in Canberra and Auckland. Then somewhere further down the track, Brisbane and maybe Wollongong. Asking price for a licence, $25 million. Good luck to them. Some may well say what's the point of even trying to get up a National Second Division under such circumstances, but the choice remains the same today as it did yesterday and probably the day before yesterday. Stay in this dead-end league (even though it is the centre of the universe), or keep trying for something even a little better, given the fact that we (and people formerly working for us) have put so much effort into trying to set up our own retro-flavoured pyramid scheme outside the actual pyramid system? Me, I say we replicate on a national scale the baffling phenomenon of the marvelously dank Sunshine Plaza being right across from the brightly lit Sunshine Marketplace.

On the streams
Filling in time until the footy starts like a normal Melburnian
One time, Frank Sinatra came in here, and sat in this chair. I say, "Frank, you hang out with Michael Eagar. Just between me and you, how old is Michael Eagar?" Know what Frank told me? He said "Hey, Michael Eagar is a hundred thirty-seven years old." A hundred and thirty-seven years old!

Preliminary final thought, also about the streams
I will watch a lot of crap on the TV and such, but I will not watch teams when they're playing in grey kits anymore. Enough. Gully, out. Langwarrin, doubly out for wearing a grey kit when their home kit is blue and they were playing against a team that wears red. Wouldn't have been in that mess in the first place if the Moreland vs Magic stream was working though. 

Final thought
Thanks to Johnny for the lift back the city, always appreciated.

Outsourcing - South Melbourne 2 Melbourne Knights 1

South Melbourne FC maintained their perfect start to the season with a hard-fought 2-1 win over Melbourne Knights on Monday night at Lakeside Stadium. Due to an athletics meet that took over the stadium over the preceding weekend, the match between South Melbourne and Melbourne Knights was played as a one-off Monday night fixture at Lakeside Stadium. However, it is unclear if the move made a difference to the number of people attending.

The hosts started brightly and were rewarded in the 23rd minute when Marco Jankovic rose highest to head home off another Max Mikkola long throw-in, much to the delight of the home fans. In the second half, they doubled their lead with Pat Langlois pouncing on Chris Oldfield's save from Marcus Schroen's curling shot.

The Knights pulled one back from the penalty spot after goalkeeper Javi Lopez made a desperate attempt to collect the ball in the box, resulting in a foul. The remainder of the match saw South Melbourne revert to overly defensive tactics. While the victory was cause for celebration, the disheartening prospect of goalkeeper Javi Lopez winning the club's MVP award again looms large. Lopez was once again instrumental in South Melbourne's win, making several crucial saves to keep the Knights at bay. 

The match saw South Melbourne's star striker Ajak Riak being kept well in check by the Knights' defense, but Langlois was a standout performer in midfield, scoring a goal and creating several other chances throughout the match. The victory also raises questions about whether South Melbourne fans should be happy with the team's style of play, given their excellent start to the season. Some argue that the club's winning record should be enough to satisfy fans, while others maintain that the team's tactics should reflect the club's traditions.

Next game
Away against Dandenong Thunder on Saturday night. I almost hope that we lose so that Esteban stops wearing that non-club branded polo top. Very superstitious man, I'm told. Me, I abhor superstitions, and especially sporting superstitions. It implies a lack of trust in your ability to get results on your own merits. Leave the augury and haruspicy to the mug punters, I reckon.

There was a cup draw
Yes, I know. Came home from work, fired up the old laptop, launched Twitter, and saw that we'd been draw as the home against Kingston. Then I went to check out the tail end of the live draw video on Facebook, and the person commenting on the draw kept saying "verse" instead of "versus", and I couldn't shut off the video quickly enough. 

What's a truck?
What's an AGM? By the way, if they don't announce a date by tomorrow, the earliest the next AGM can be held will be April, a full month after the last AGM was held, which itself was held way later than it should have been. Maybe this is all part of the plan to align our financial reporting with the actual season, rather than the financial year. Maybe I just made that up.

Amway! Amway! Amway!
32 consortia - mostly single clubs, but also a handful of group efforts or partnerships - have put in an expression of interest for the National Second Division. The expression of interest is merely a first step of course, because afterwards you actually have to make a bid. Eight Victorian clubs have put in an expression of interest, and South Melbourne is one of those eight clubs. 

Of the 32 consortia, 15 have some connection to National Soccer League participants, almost all of them as standalone prospects. Consider the numbers I suppose. There were about 40 odd teams which played in the NSL. About a dozen of them are no longer in existence; another three are in the A-League. So of the 25 odd remaining NSL clubs, fifteen are still keen on taking another stab at something approximating national league football. You can take out of that what you will.

Without going into this too deeply, showing mock shock at the gumption of some of these upstarts thinking that they can compete at that level, I will make note of a couple of interesting absentees. Queensland Lions, objectively one of the wealthiest clubs outside the A-League, are sitting this process out, figuring I suppose that once bitten, twice shy. The other surprise absentee, considering the, er, "caliber" of some of the Victorian clubs who have expressed an interest, is Oakleigh. Who knows what their rationale might be in making that decision.

Uh, excuse me, Professor Brainiac, but I worked in a nuclear power plant for 10 years, and, uh, I think I know how a proton accelerator works
Of all the... look, let's get the disclaimers out of the way. I only got to see other people's responses to whatever the original comment was, because the original comment maker has me blocked on Twitter, which is absolutely their right to do so; that is what the block button is there for. Anything else then is me inferring what was said, which was probably something to do with how great it would be for South Melbourne Hellas and its fans when the new Anzac station is up and running when the Metro Tunnel project is finished in a couple of years, and how convenient it will be for getting to and from Lakeside.

Maybe. Look, I love public transport, even when it hates me. There is no one at South Melbourne that's more gaga for more trains and more non-car ways to get to all the grounds. And as someone currently living within the catchment of a station on the under-construction Metro Tunnel line, I can't wait for the project to be finished, even if it will mean an additional interchange to get to my workplace, assuming AI hasn't made my role redundant by then. But will Anzac station make getting to Lakeside Stadium easier by public transport? 

Well, yes, kinda, sorta, under one very specific set of conditions, and even then only if you're coming in from the south-east and you don't mind a vigorous constitutional, ala Sideshow Bob. That's it. If you're coming in from anywhere else, it'll do diddly for you, because you'd still be better off getting the number 12 or the 96 or even the bloody no. 1 from the CBD, unless you really, really like walking. 

Let's assume for argument's sake that both stands and both gates are open. The no. 96, whose nearest station to Lakeside is Albert Park, is a 700 metre odd walk. The no. 1, which stops at the corner of Park and Clarendon, is about 600 metres away, though you also have to deal with slow meander through the theatre and arts district. The no. 12 is about 150 metres away, with the main bit of awfulness being the very bad tram stop, which fortunately (from a safety standpoint) rarely has to deal with large crowds.

The future Anzac station/former Domain interchange site is over 1.2 kilometres away from Lakeside. Being that far along a busy road, there are also several traffic lights which need to be crossed. The average person takes about five minutes to walk 500 metres. Realistically, you're looking at a walking journey of over 15 minutes. If you're walking along the north side of the route, it's not exactly the most pedestrian friendly pathway. If you're walking on the park side, especially within the park itself, it's not the best lit place at night. 

A few years ago now, I walked from Lakeside after a match to the now defunct Domain interchange (which is slightly to the north of the future Anzac station) in order to go watch The Godfather at The Astor with my brothers. What a slog, and I'm not just talking about the movie. I occasionally walk between Sunshine station and my house (when public transport lets me down, or when the weather's nice), which is about five hundred metres more than Lakeside is from the Anzac station site, and my goodness, what an awful experience. Looking back at my Google Maps data from the day, it says I traveled 1.6 kilometres by foot, and that I ran. That's how fast I was apparently walking.

And I mention this because it seemed to be that someone was making the claim (and I hope that I am wrong about that) that it was merely a four minute walk from the Anzac station site to Lakeside. That's pure nonsense. From Sunshine to my place, it's a leisurely 15 minute stroll, with just one set of lights and a couple of small pedestrian crossings to navigate. And one could, of course, more often than not choose to catch the bus. There is no bus or tram service between the future Anzac station and Lakeside. So in short, the eventual arrival of Anzac station is actually going to be of negligible benefit to South fans.

The answer to none of your questions
So, why was Pat Langlois' goal from the corner against Moreland not filmed by the NPL cameraperson? Because they are under instruction to film all substitutions, and being inconsiderate, we decided to take the corner quickly.

On the streams
Everyone has a vice
Someone goes to me the other day, "you seem to watch a lot of NPL TV"; a comment which sounded to sit halfway between observation and accusation, and that's the way I've decided to take it. If there was somewhere to go, I would've gone. If there was something else to watch, I wouldn't watched it. If there something else to do, I would've done it. Or maybe I'm just kidding myself? Maybe I'm sick enough about this league to stay home, and watch Gully pick up three points in a grey away with indecipherable green numbers. The flick it over to watch the Bergers look hopeless against an energetic St Albans. The next day, there was some spiciness behind the goals between Avondale and Hume supporters, and once again no one in Avondale's little shed stand; I'm told that this is because its safety permit has lapsed, and they're awaiting council approval to let people into it again. And they want to join... well, who knows.

Final thought
Sure we used about 40 odd players that year, but of all the things to lie about, claiming to have played for South Melbourne in 2011 seems like one of the more stupid lies to come up with about yourself.

Lavender Blues - Green Gully 1 South Melbourne 3

Bringing order to chaos, but at what cost?
You know I'd almost forgotten that we didn't go to Green Gully Reserve last year? Rocking up to the game, I was shocked to be welcomed to a paved parking lot. Unfortunately it's one of those hideous concoctions which actively reduced the number of available spots. That'd be more a problem if there were actually any people there. Crowd was ordinary. There was no curtain raiser game to artificially fill out the concourse with parents and reserves players. There was also no Maltese marching band. Instead there was a dated Artie K-like mix playing over the speakers (ugh), and a free match program (very much appreciated), but hardly any sort of vibe from us or them. Can't wait to take this energy into the National Second Division.

What about all the times I didn't wear a tutu?! Nobody ever brings those up! 
You wear a suit to one game, and then that's all you are: suit guy. To get around that, I got home early on Friday, got changed into my South Melbourne Gunners t-shirt, only to find that I'd started an unholy trend. Me, the fashion trend-setter. Θα χαλάσει ο καιρός, as my mum likes to say.

Granny chic
Speaking of fashion, we were thankfully spared by virtue of being the away team, from seeing Green Gully's awful grey away kit. I don't know what it is about teams that think silver and grey are god kit colours, but anyway. Gully's goalkeeper kits this year include a shade of lavender that's pure old lady hand soap. Admittedly, I pine for the days where goalkeepers wore a solid clash colour jersey, and a shorts and socks combo that matched their teammates. 

Apples and Oranges
Unusually (I think? I'm not so sure now) the NSW NPL started earlier than its Victorian counterpart this season, so I've seen a little of their games and highlights. Their synthetic pitches and too many futsal players posing as outfield players gives that comp if not quite an air of effeteness, than certainly at least a postmodern sense of digital, anodyne precision. NPL Victoria, by comparison, though being played on better quality fields than ever, still has a bit more physicality. NSW players may more regularly score top bins goals, but it's always a bit easier when the ball doesn't bobble, and there's no Nikola Jurkovic types waiting to kill you.

One may not have thought it possible based on their 2000-2011 iteration, but Green Gully would nowadays almost fit in better north of the Murray than they do south of it. Remember when coming to Green Gully Reserve as a South fan meant not just an inevitable loss, but also a bruising one? Now we haven't lost there since 2013, and it seems to get that little bit easier each time. The old grinding, ugly Gully is gone, replaced by a ball playing side that could do great things, were it not for the fact that they play in a predominantly counter-attacking league.

And which team is both more conditioned to and adept at playing pure counter-attacking football than South Melbourne? Based on a statistically insignificant (but still instructive) two matches, not much has changed for us, except for the height of the balls going forward. Last year they were very high; this year they're a bit lower. That's all down to having Ajak Riak in the place of Harry Sawyer.

Now I may have gone off half-cocked on the forum a few weeks ago when watching choppy footage of a Greek Community Cup match, claiming Riak would not score a goal this season except by accident, such was his apparent lack of coordination. People at that relevant claim that he looked OK, nothing like what us stay-at-homes were watching, and maybe they've been proven right.

Riak seems to know how play off the shoulder of the last defender, he seems to know where to move, and how to generally make the right or at least better decision when provided with two or more possibilities. His cause (and ours) were helped by being up against a team that's no longer the old thug Gully on a choppy field, (pointless baited into it Zidane headbutts notwithstanding), so there was enough space to do his thing. It might not be so useful when teams play more compactly against us.

Still, his mere presence makes us more watchable (and that's no slight on Sawyer's very productive 2022 season), but overall there's not likely to be much change to the way we play. Maybe the full backs will get a bit further up the field a bit more often. but the entire race to be runner-up hinges on Ajak not getting hurt - the rest of the squad will be rotated in and out on a needs basis. The small bonus is if we transfer to playing a more ground ball attacking game, instead of a high ball one, it will be easier to switch to someone like Alun Webb playing up front when Riak inevitably gets injured.

Next game
Melbourne Knights at home on Monday night. No, it's not the Labour Day public holiday Monday; that's the week after. Athletics has the field over the weekend; fair enough. Also, kickoff has been moved from 7:30pm to 8:15pm to accommodate apparently "overwhelming interest", which is just code for let's make it even harder for Paul to get home after the game, because there's going to be rail replacement buses, and cabs that don't turn up even though they're allegedly one minute away, and then you walk home. And all this just to watch us lose to the second best team in the NPL (after Oakleigh, of course). Should I just go home after work and watch it on the TV? Maybe. 

NSD news
More and more teams have put out their little press releases that they're expressing an interest. We haven't done that yet.

AGM news
None. Might as well just privatise the club.

On the streams
Hip to be square (balls)
It occurred to me, much later than it should have, that this season is another pointless one. Just as pointless as the usual pointless ones, when there was misplaced hope of getting people back to the club by winning stuff. More pointless than the ones where we were all accosted by A-League bid nonsense. More pointless than those seasons where winning the league didn't matter, because it was all about the FFA Cup. More pointless than those aborted COVID seasons, and the pointless (but at least ultimately hilarious) Bespoke Cup season. Oakleigh's going to win the title this season or, at best, be cheated out of it by an Act of God. So could we at least enjoy the relegation battle (24 more points to go...)? Well, no. Thanks to the NSD (which is totally going to happen), there's possibly going to be three or four or five Victorian clubs getting out of this circle of hell, which will shake up the entire local league system. So what then if Port or Avondale score bangers against relegation candidates? So what if Moreland gets an upset win against a now zero and two Bentleigh? So what if Preston drop a point here or there on their way to promotion, to what exactly? Thunder vs Dinamo eight goal banger? Pointless, unless you're a gambler living in that particular moment where you're sweating on + or - 3.5 goals. Yes, I suppose we could just enjoy the games on their own merits, as they veer from one goal from a misplaced pass to another goal from a set piece. 

Final thought
Turns out that one of the court officers I work with is a Perth Glory fan. Just when I thought I'd shed all proximity to Western Australian nonsense, it's right there three metres away.